Magically Mundane

a truly pathetic post- Schoolies

2011-11-21T13:53:00.000-08:00

I will try to type even though there is much dust on my keyboard. The shame, the shame.... anyways, my children are both in school now! Well, they have been for the past two months, but I am moving on from that lapse in mom chronicling. I must forgive myself!

Bradie started kindergarten and is doing very well! Her teacher is impressed with her skills and her sweetness, and really that's more than we could ask for. She is such an eager and enthusiastic learner. She is right on the cusp of having reading click- really she can do it, but I don't think she's quite confident enough to believe that she can. So we do lots of practicing and out loud word games where she thinks about the words she's saying and the sounds they may include. We are so proud.

Beau is in the three year old class at preschool and doing pretty well.... I think. It's quite different because I remember Bradie really blossoming noticeably when she started preschool, so maybe its a curmudgeon-y boy thing? Bradie was practically 4 when she started so maybe that is it, I don't know. And Beau is very much a 3.5 year old, although I do notice he's starting to become a bit for flexible here and there. But I do know I haven't had any calls from the teacher about behavior issues or pee in the pants :) I just know that I am enjoying my little man quite a bit, nuzzling and kissing on him lots before he gets hairy and too cool for mom to touch him in any way.

What else? Oh yes, we will be welcoming Meriweather #3 in late April. And that is such a blessing, every child is, but I think I realize it more clearly this time. After watching the door of adoption close in a slooooow, limbo-filled way and yet having a certain, remaining desire to add to our family, this seemed like a joyful and logical conclusion. I didn't think it would be a stressful surrendering of my heart, but it was, as I had many doubts. But now Marcus and I feel peace, a shared peace, over this new direction.

So, yes, there's much to be thankful for!

travelogue 2

2011-09-25T20:34:00.000-07:00

Here it is, ma! So after three glorious days on the ocean, the m-fields packed up and met my sis and her brood and Sal up at Seatac to fly to Pennsylvania for my Uncle Bill's 70th birthday! We haven't made the trek to see this side of the fam since I was 17.... so many years, and children, ago. It was an eventful trip (can you say cancelled flight with five kids ages 3-10?) But they had good attitudes and we eventually made it out there the following day.

The rest of the trip kinda flew by, losing a day and all, and was pretty low-key, but turned out to be perfect. Here's my mom with her last living auntie Pauline, cousin Sandra and Uncle Bill on the right.

Here's the similar looking ladies of the Johnson clan :)
Here are the Mankamyers! Aunt Bonnie, cousin Scott with his bride Melissa, and Uncle Bill. The young ladies are my 2nd cousins that I SO enjoyed meeting. From the top down, they are Ally, Mia and Avery. They opened up their home, fed us, gave up their beds and busted out a 30 cup coffee percolator for our stay- all of which was much appreciated by us as we were given the clear directive from them that "mi casa es su casa"
Here's cousins enjoying some FRESH and DELICIOUS PA corn! Seriously money.
And here's cousin WWE. Seriously, it was such a blessing to have the kids be close enough in age that everyone got along and played super well together. I remember Marcus saying to Beau has he ran by "Beau! I haven't seen you all day!" Literally. Which, I'm not gonna lie, makes it almost like a true vacation for the parents too ;)

I don't want to leave anything out, so here's some bullets. I am not a big user of bullets but I thought my mom would appreciate these:)

-antiquing with sis and Auntie B

-earthquake

-Fuddruckers

-Gettysburg

-CORN... and I am not even a corn lover!

-mountain pies....mmmm.... look it up :)

-reminiscing and really listening to others relish in their memories

-sharing stories of God's call and faithfulness

-old photos of Uncle Bill rollerskating

FYI, I got so into this post that I missed my oven timer and made a batch of hockey pucks instead of ginger snaps....ooops!

travelogue 1

2011-09-16T20:38:00.000-07:00

So this summer was noteworthy to be sure and I would be silly to not share some of what we did. In mid August we spent three nights at Seabrook with Marcus' family. If you haven't been to Seabrook, climb out from under your rock and GO! It is a fabulous place to go with family. Our weather was pristine and slightly chilly- really can't ask for much more than that when you visit the mighty Pacific.

Here's a group shot :)

On the perimeter of Seabrook's property is forest, including some of these massive old growth stumps that I just had to get a picture of. Marcus and Beau are practicing for Beau's upcoming strong man competition where he must throw 500 pound pieces of drift wood.
Marcus and I actually got about hip deep in the ocean! It was a blast! Nothing like jumping waves to make you feel young again. Although after awhile I could barely feel my feet and I was worried a wave might take me out in that feeble condition. So Marcus buried me in some warm, soft sand... it was heavenly. Until I, you know, had to get up.
Then Bradie wanted in on the action!
It was a such a perfect trip and I wouldn't have changed a thing. Here's Bradie being a monkey. We're not sure why the "monkey" comes out when the camera's on, but oh well. It's a nice picture of a handsome man.

Keep a look out for travelogue 2. There's more to our adventures. I'll try to not wait a month this time. Or maybe I will- it was kind of nice to dust off summer here since all is busy now with fall and school. Just kidding, mom!

2011-07-30T11:13:00.000-07:00

I've been meaning to post this- my inlaws are having a house BUILT for them! Yippeeeeee! We are SO excited for them as I can think of no one who deserves it more!

Check it out by clicking on Janie's blog. She has been doing a fabulous job documenting the process.

In her words "God is so good"

For limited time only... an infomercial of sorts

2011-07-24T14:16:00.000-07:00

Most people that read my blog know that Marcus and I have spent the last three months in submission to Tony Horton and the P90X routine. I feel a little crazy for posting PICTURES, half naked ones no less, but still here are some before and after shots with stretch marks cropped out... I mean I am not THAT crazy.

After:

Before:
So there you have it... YOU yes, YOU can look like this if you work your A$$ off for three months and not eat junk! only three EASY (but not cheap) payments and a gallon of FREE sweat can take you there!!! So what are waiting for?!

Ha. but seriously, my favorite part, and the most surprising to me, are my pectorals which are pretty BA and actually got bigger. The best part is how enjoyable it was having a "shared activity" with Marcus these last three months. We tried to do the work outs together whenever we could and celebrated one another's accomplishments.... and I hereby dare HIM to do his own post because he looks great!

Something even more treasured to me is that I just finished reading the Bible, beginning to end. I started that journey at the end of January following the 90 day reading program (woops!) but am still proud to have finished in about five months. I have been loving God's Word more and more these past few years and finally reading through non-stop has only deepened my understanding of His big picture and His holiness, and ultimately of His love for us all.

Marcus has been walking back and forth while I have been trying to formulate this post and even accused me of being long-winded! Can you believe that?! So I will sum up:

Open your Bible.

Put it on the floor.

Assume a Plank position over open Bible.

Start doing push ups while reading.

Don't stop until you have pecs,

don't stop until you are like Jesus.

Baby, you're a firework...

2011-07-05T13:25:00.000-07:00

Happy belated Independence Day, gentle readers. I had way too much fun last night standing out in my very own driveway trying to capture the fruits of MANY neighbors' expensive hobby.

I finally figured out a small aperture and slow shutter makes for a nice exposure. I didn't use a tripod but experimented with holding the camera next to my belly while not breathing. I actually like the blur, it's very other-worldly.

Also, driving up the I-5 corridor on the 4th of July is the best of all worlds... crossing the trestle and looking at the intermittently smoky and sparkly panorama almost made me a bit emotional. Freedom is too wonderful for words sometimes.

rain is a blessing

2011-06-14T16:17:00.000-07:00

As Wildkratts winds down...

You know a potted Hosta is happy when you can't see the pot :)

Above are close ups and one broad shot of my wildflower garden. Broadcasting a pack of seeds in a cup of sand is embarrassingly easy.
This is trailing soapwart that I started from seed last year and it didn't do much! Now it is full of pink moundy-ness that I just love. And see those cool circular leaves? They are from the wild flower broadcasting...perhaps I had a little bird friend help me? The purple violas are from TWO years ago! They keep seeding themselves. They're like weeds almost. My cup runneth over.

I am turning into a random blogger I know. I'll do a true update soon.

some other March stuff in April...

2011-04-06T11:41:00.000-07:00

Early birthday visit to the Gig, where the next generation finally had some outdoors time in the fort/smurf pond where Heather and I would play. Not together though, I was way too pesky and loud for my sister. At least now we are friends. Far better late than never at all, I say! Above in the tree is my niece Emma, who is TEN!? Crazy.

We hiked the Lime Kiln trail yesterday as a family, no rain and BEFORE the snow, so win win :)
Had some special play time with special friends.
So I turned 30, finally. It was really nice and my family really took their time to celebrate me, which is always wonderful. Marcus actually surprised me with an overnight away! We stayed down on the waterfront and it was very nice. Auntie Caren took the kiddos and she is so good with them that I truly experienced close to 24 hours of not a care in the world. Marcus also got me one of my favorite gifts ever- a dutch oven which produced my first (and definitely not last!) artisan bread loaf that is pictured above.

uno, dos, TRES!

2011-03-02T19:46:00.000-08:00

Beau es muy loco! Today we celebrated three years of Beau in our lives. It was actually a difficult day. Since I wrote last, Beau HAS peed on the potty countless times but is beginning that fence-dwelling stage with his, you know, number two. He thinks he MIGHT want to try it sometime, yet he completely hides and yells "privacy!" when he's doing the deed. Anyway, he is withholding a bit and that makes for a discontented soul. But after a dinner of his favorites, hot dogs and baked beans, nature could not be denied and we ended Beau's 3rd birthday on a HAPPY note! Looked at how relaxed he looks in this picture! I think the chocolate stupor and empty tummy combo did him good.

All in all, I think this kid's got a chance. He's my boy and he has stolen more heart from me than I thought I had in the first place.

If your curious about the "friends" in the background, that is Bradie's doing. They are the audience/partygoers of the big event. What a great big sister!
As for Marcus, he is currently watching some sort of dog and pony show on a tiny little tv...something about a new Apple product... an iNapkin or something. Marcus loves when I bust out my inner (outer?) Luddite. Marcus does not roll his eyes. Instead he furrows his brow and his eyes become tiny slits. The slits enable the malice to shoot out faster, like a laser, hoping to puncture my cold, cold heart. The nerdery is a desperate, yet loyal place.

January Schmanuary

2011-02-19T20:17:00.000-08:00

January, Happy New Year, blah blah.... its all highly overrated. Well, probably not, but that is what I say to cover up this inert place I have been dwelling. My life has been anything from lazy to harried lately so that leaves me flummoxed whenever I would sit down to post. Confession: I had to look up flummoxed. But flummoxed is how I felt whenever I considered posting. I mean, how do you update a neglected blog? Do you do it exhaustively? Do you provide vignettes? Is there anyone even reading this? More questions than answers, in my life as of late. Including, but certainly not limited to:

-are we going to live here for four more years?

-what elementary school should Bradie go to for kindergarten?

-should we buy a couch with our tax return?

-should I try growing my hair out per my daughter's request?

-should I switch to a dairy free diet during my luteal phase? (if you don't know, don't look it up)

-will this little tyke decide to wise up and put his urine in toilet so he too can go to school?

but, goodness, he is cute! Yeah, so it snowed...sometime... in January.

Bradie Snippet: Bradie is still allergic to cows milk. In the picture below, however, she is consuming her very first REAL quesadilla. I took a picture because quesadillas hold a special place in my heart as they remind me fondly of my mother and lazy Sundays and golf on CBS. The explanation of this miracle? GOATS! We heart goats! I had them do a goat milk scratch test on her, which came up clean. Goat cheese is cheap at WinCo. In addition to an artist and a cheerleader, Bradie would like to be an astronaut when she grows up. And also a pirate. "But the good kind that gives money to people that don't have any" So Robin Hood. On a boat, apparently. I love my daughter.

What else? Why is this blue?! Anyways, Lori and I have been back at it again with more shenanigans and tom foolery for church. Playing very loosely of the Real Housewives series we created the Real Housewives of the Old Testament as our women's Bible church is doing a character study series. Here I am as Eve. You should click on this. That is a real mink!

For installment two of RHOT, we tackled the problem that Eve has, quite literally, nothing to wear. Here she is sampling a Snuggie(O-town peeps holla!) and some sort of harness???

Really, Lori and I just have too much fun doing this! Making merry and the ability to laugh at oneself is an invaluable skill... keeps pride and general stuffiness at bay :)

duh

2010-12-29T13:49:00.000-08:00

From a candy-induced hangover/stupor, I have suddenly realized that I have not a put a link on my blog for Casey Lynch and art. Casey is the husband of my dear Maggie and is quite a dear in his own right :)

Click on Casey Lynch Art to view his stuff! He's the real deal Holyfield :)

2010-12-18T21:04:00.000-08:00

Below is Bradie the Ballerina 3/4. By the final installment, she was not so crazy about me putting that hair in a bun. This is also my version of Beth Moore :) I greatly admire that woman. It was not easy to channel the Texas teasing skills, but thanks to some trusty AquaNet, I managed. "Turn to one another and say 'Girlfriend... do your homework!'"

All dressed up for the preschool Christmas program. It was adorable of course, and hysterical. From the singing that is shouting to the kid in the back that looked like he was having his mug shots snapped, I giggled until my eyes watered. Bradie is so very sweet. She did her singing and signing with such passion, her little face knit into what I call the Bradie Brow- those who know her intimately know this look of compassion. It rends me every time.

And lastly our Charlie Brown tree. No really. On the price sheet at the Troop 43's Christmas Tree lot, there is listed "Charlies, $15" I told the lad to take me to those... and here we found this EIGHT foot Christmas tree for 15 bucks! Spindly and a little silly but perfect for how I roll.

Christmas is not about a beautiful hundred dollar tree (which is like half our budget...hello!) It is about Almighty God HUMBLING himself to take on flesh for OUR good. The Incarnation simply astounds me. It's no wonder the event inspires this

Christ by highest heav'n adored
Christ the everlasting Lord!
Late in time behold Him come
Offspring of a Virgin's womb
Veiled in flesh the Godhead see
Hail the incarnate Deity
Pleased as man with man to dwell
Jesus, our Emmanuel
Hark! The herald angels sing
"Glory to the newborn King!"

Hail the heav'n-born Prince of Peace!
Hail the Son of Righteousness!
Light and life to all He brings
Ris'n with healing in His wings
Mild He lays His glory by
Born that man no more may die
Born to raise the sons of earth
Born to give them second birth
Hark! The herald angels sing
"Glory to the newborn King!"

Man I have tears in my eyes just reading this. Christmas changed everything. Amen!

maybe HE will be a foodie too...someday

2010-12-06T11:32:00.001-08:00

I just prepared Beau's favorite for lunch. Grilled Cheese and Tomato soup. Okay, so it's one of my favorites too.

I called to him and told him that lunch was ready. He walks out to the kitchen and takes note of what is being served.

Beau then proceeds to remove ALL his clothing and ask for a bib! He is ready to GET AFTER IT!

Now THAT is what I am talking about.

maybe SHE will Scrabble it up with me...someday

2010-12-04T16:31:00.000-08:00

The kids are watching a movie right now. We've been trimming our Charlie Brown tree for a good part of the afternoon, naps were skipped, and I need a little bit of quiet to gather my thoughts.

While wiping glitter drifts from my dining table I hear Bradie call out, "Mom, can I have something to nibble?"

I wasn't sure that was what she said, so to confirm I repeat "Nibble?"

she answers, "yes, nibble is another word for something to eat."

What's an "ode", mommy?

2010-10-15T20:28:00.000-07:00

Dear Bradie,

Won't you come and oblige mommy with your presence and smile at a birthday photo shoot? I know are busy in your worlds of make believe but your new dress and the bright blue sky were made for you...

I know this feeling. So does Homer Simpson. So does every human being. It is called "Doh!" Much of life will not even come close to perfect and that includes you... give yourself grace as you grow and learn, my dear.
Wearing your heart on your sleeve will get you into trouble sometimes. It may also make it easier for people to connect to you. I pray your authenticity only grows deeper and richer, sweet girl.
You love to laugh and have fun. Your laughing, candid smile melts my heart.
My prayer for you is that you continue praying. And that you would have a strong character. And that you will share your beauty, inside and out, with our world that needs it desperately.

Five Years Old

2010-10-10T15:09:00.000-07:00

Our little Miss has enjoyed a weekend of birthday wonder to celebrate her five years! On the actual day of her birthday, Bradie went to preschool where she brought birthday snack, brought in a sharing item (think show and tell) AND was the star of the day! I mean, wow! And THEN on Saturday some little buddies came in costume to join our pumpkin covered house for a raucous party.

Here is Bradie in her ballerina outfit, a gift from Grandma Sally, which she LOVED. I did her hair up and even put make up on that sweet face. SO fun!

Close up of the sweet face :)
Here we are with our neighbor friends Corrina and Randi.
Even Mommy and Daddy dressed up :)
Here's a secret about Marcus: he is REALLY good at handling a group of littles. He would say "ears!" and they would all stop talking and cover the ears and look at him, waiting for instruction. Awesome. Here they are playing pin the smile on the Jack o' lantern.
And a little secret about me: I do not like planning parties. I like going to parties- that is my gift :)- but planning sends me into a little bit of a tizzy of anxiousness. Seriously, my eye was twitching for a week and a half! BUT I am growing. It is becoming a little easier for me and I actually had fun, which is a blessing for this non-planning planner :)

Our weekend of Bradie's 5th is still going on as I type! Grandma Janie, Papa Dave and Auntie Caren came up for today to have Bradie (who was NOT sick of opening presents) open some more presents!!! One of which was a brand new 16'' bike! Afterwards we hit the lanes for a highly competitive round of bumper bowl and then Famous Dave's for various sauce-covered meat products :) Now we fill the living room taking in Disney's souped up version of Beauty and Beast, courtesy of Grandma and Papa.

phew! What a weekend! Thank you to all our friends and family who helped us celebrate our BIG girl. I hope to post some more photos soon.

And, finally, I present to you Shhhh.....

2010-10-02T22:01:00.000-07:00

My dear Tiffany, whom I shared many a laugh, tears, peppering sweat fest, boy ogling, stalking Ed, the remaining hot rollers, and Saturday morning breakfasts with turned 30. That could be the most ridiculous sentence I've ever typed but I don't even care! It's my Tiffany! Her lovely family threw her a surprise party last Saturday and I had the pleasure to attend. What a blessing! A big thanks goes to my schwenktastic friend Christy who agreed to take my kids while Marcus finished up some basketball business so I could skedaddle down to Tacoma to be there before the big moment.

Okay, here we have some giddy party guests and my nostril. Erin, I told you I would erase this but its a cute picture of you and Cara as well. I was in Tiff's wedding with these gals and it was quite a treat to see them and meet their offspring since I HAVEN'T met any of them in person!!!! *hanging head in shame...*

Anyways... ah, yes. Here we have a peeking Jamie and Ludy, Tiff's sister and mom who worked hard planning this shindig... "shhh! She's here!" Jamie probably said "damn" during this part too but I was too excited. I'm sure she said it later.
SURPRISE! Please click on this to see Jackson's face too. Priceless.
Later on, little Avery helping mama unwrap some gifts...
And the grand finale! A book of Tiff's blog created by her family!
Okay, so this made me emotional. Tiffany received a book of her blog! I remember being so overwhelmed when Janie gave me the book she had prepared for me of this blog last Christmas. I was not expecting it at all and Tiffany clearly was not either! So cool! Tiffany is a great blogger and writer and I have been so blessed by it- I've known Tiffany's "voice" for many years and it helps me not feel so far from her to stay in the know at least a little. Well done Kory and family that produced this book- it is definitely something worth celebrating!

And, again and belatedly, Happy Birthday Tiffa! May this be your best year yet.

2010-09-17T21:12:00.000-07:00

They were playing. TOGETHER. While wearing winter hats. I could not help but snap a picture. When they play and laugh together it is like music to me. Like when a struggling band finally gets it together. Like when a group of misfit acquaintances have detention together on a Saturday morning. Like magic.

You can almost hear him say: "No! No! I want an Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle!"

I love google. I love my kids.

goings on

2010-09-13T20:03:00.000-07:00

Happy 1st day of Preschool! Moving on up to the 4 year old class is Bradie Lady seen here in a stunner of a peasant inspired dress courtesy of Kohls. And Auntie Caren :). She is a reluctant starlet... or something... not sure what exactly this face means. I think it is the same face I make when someone pitches me an idea that I think is a bad one but I am trying to be gracious. Beau's clothing, I know you are curious, is courtesy of the greater Snohomish County Hand-me-down system. I love that system!

SO excited about this latest acquisition! Mark and Teri delivered us a bunk bed they had sitting in their basement! It is pretty much exactly what we wanted too and that part of the blessing just tickles me. But apparently it does come with strings. Mark and Teri's grown daughter warned them that "they'd better take care of it!" A Velveteen Rabbit of a bunk bed is very precious indeed.
Fatty fatty two by four... these sunflower heads are enormous! Sorry if you are tired of me obsessing over these.
Close up: Does anyone know if I should cut this down? Let it keep going? What?
The back of the giant seed head catches a bit of rainfall and flying insects LOVE the plant making it a perfect attraction for this cute little opportunist.

Bradie's First Backpacking Trip!

2010-08-27T21:00:00.000-07:00

Go to Marcus' blog and read a GREAT post about some daddy/daughter bonding.

http://marcusthoughts.wordpress.com/2010/08/27/bradies-first-backpacking-trip/

growing

2010-08-23T11:33:00.000-07:00

My kids are getting bigger! And more challenging. And lovelier because the challenge simply arises from the fact that they are becoming more like people. Beau has learned to stall bedtime by asking for extra hugs and kisses. His language has taken flight this summer and it's been a blast to hear him try new words everyday. He really needs a twin bed- I think he feels less hemmed in and cozy with the toddler bed, so he usually spends nap time in Bradie's bed.
Bradie wasn't all that impressed with the budgies at Woodland Park Zoo. Bradie cracks me up- she's been learning to read this summer and sometimes sounds out the words she's saying to me in normal conversation! She loves to crack jokes, act silly, and play elaborate pretend games.

My roaring snow leopards.

I guess I failed to mention in my last whiny post that there were three other giants growing, albeit slower, next to one that was felled by that devilcoon
I am not sure that third, lower stock to the left of Bradie will bloom but it is still impressive. And redemptive.

2010-07-27T13:40:00.000-07:00

Here was the sun flower on 7/16. The top picture was taken 7/25! Can you believe that?!

But I am sorry and a little sore inside this morning about losing this giant plant last night. A raccoon, balancing its gluttonous body along the fence must have been spooked and mistook it for a tree. Boohiss! I tried to rollover and go to sleep (it happened around midnight) but my heart was a bit disturbed. I have to admit, however, that hearing my neighbors (yes, at midnight) relay things like "If you guys kill that little f@#$r, I'll skin it and make you a hat" was strangely comforting and therapeutic.

I am feeling quite humbled these past couple of days and it makes perfect sense that this little event might be the grand finale. Geez, I hope so. Really if this is the worst that happens to me this week, life is still pretty grand.

Sleep was evading me beforehand as I was pouring through an adoption book I checked out at the library. One of the chapters I read talked about dealing with your own losses as you progress through the adoption process. Often adoptive parents feel their own set of losses even before they bring home a child already wounded with probably the most painful loss one can endure. So you can imagine how serious the task is for parents to get healthy, grieve and come to a place they can parent out of acceptance of their own stuff and not out of fear.

Yeah, I know, light reading. I cried thinking about families enduring infertility and stillbirths, angry that they have all that pain and no answers. No explanations. I haven't thought about this side of it before and it really hit me. And humbled me. It's obvious to think about children who are unwanted, mistreated, even unsuccessfully aborted. But it's a bit of a paradigm shift to consider the parents who choose to adopt and their road to that decision.

I am overwhelmed but trusting God. Especially in His goodness. It is not a leap to believe in the existence of a higher Somebody, but it is out of the obedient heart that I will choose to trust that my God is not only mighty, but also so very very good. I am learning that He truly loves me and wants the very best for me. That truth is like a compass to me on days when I want to chase a proverbial bouncy ball onto a busy street, forgetting all the precedences that have been set beforehand that tell me the very thing I think I want will hurt me.

Because this is my blog and I can do whatever I want with it, I will also include some fancy-free after this leaded post:

beaunocurls. It was time for a change. Bradie does not like it. :)

floatilla

2010-07-07T09:30:00.000-07:00

i have a positive ID on a rambunctious amphibious preschooler...

easy living

2010-07-03T21:15:00.000-07:00

my opinion is that these two are just too dang cute!
Bradie and I were having tea time with our reading lesson a few weeks ago... might have to do that again soon. Tea, not the reading lesson. Most days she asks to do her lesson and inquires "is there a new sound today?" It's SO cool to see her excited to learn!
Okay, so Beau spends at least an hour a day parking his toy cars on his overturned Lightning McQueen chair. Also he spends most of his time in diaper only.
Soaking up some vitamin D in Spokane!
Giant sunflowers are super fun! See the mini variety right next door :)

kdfadkfhgk;ahdfg

2010-06-27T22:58:00.000-07:00

You may thank my mother for this post. It was her flack that motivated me to do this :)

Again, I feel that so much has been going on this month and, here it is, almost over! I cannot do it much justice so I will resort to bullet points

- finished PRIDE training- woohoo

- made it through the vortex that is June basketball

-visited the Lynch clan, in Spokane, man I am a fan of that Lynch clan in Spokane! (what now Suess!?)

- completed Equip 201, which is our agency's after PRIDE class. I still don't know the folks in that class real well, but man it is encouraging and motivating to see the SAME faces (read: no one is chickening out!)

What now? Gee thanks for asking... now we have homework and lots of things to do and think about. CPR certifications, blood borne pathogens certifications, letters of reference, life stories to tell (twice, by the way), family profile books to make.

I need to get stamps and a fresh ream of paper and a clue. Target, no?

A blessing for sure will be a Beth Moore study I am doing with the ladies. I will need an anchor for my fool heart during all this.

Also I am trying to run again this summer. So far so good! I ran up Highway 9 from Lundeen today. Think I caught a semi draft here and there...probably not but I did it. Baby steps.

Baby steps are the story of my life right now. Just do the one thing you know you are supposed to do. Oswald Chambers reminds me to simplify and just keep obeying one day at a time.

Arise my blog...

2010-06-05T23:18:00.000-07:00

Okay, so here's Bradie in an outfit her preschool teachers LOVED. For some reason unbeknownst. I call it the Angela Martin. Check out the drawing Bradie did of her princess placement. Really, click on it! The detail astounds me. It is very exciting and precious to watch her create things.

sweet friends.

Even sweeter friends. So a couple of months ago Lori asked me to help her do "program" (younglife style!) for our church's women's retreat. I nodded like a hungry animal and searched out my billybob teeth to pop in and get those creative juices a-flowing.

It was super fun to put this together with a friend who has meant so much to me and has in many ways watched me grow up. Unfortunately Lori's purpose we found out was only to breathe life into our program, not to see it through. Her mom's battle with terminal cancer was nearing an end and she could simply not come to the retreat. But what was so special to me was that Lori believed in me and just KNEW I could do it and it would work out.

BUT... I needed a partner. The thought of trying to do this alone made me turn green. Enter Christy. My dear friend Christy who is a type-A, plan it out, not in favor of surprises AGREED to put herself out there to help Lori and I. And she NAILED it! Really, most of the time as we were up front, making fools of ourselves, I just couldn't help but think in the back of my head, "Am I having TOO much fun?"

So that, ahem, flattering photo of Christy is her with "Lori" hair :)

Oh, and I also did the bulk of planning, filming and editing during our PRIDE classes which was NUTS, but worked out thanks to generous friends and Grandma Sally Johnson who help with our kiddos.

So...phew... an update. There were lofty, vocabulous plans for these writs but as it is June I thought I really should just git er done! Also, we are done with PRIDE (I have to make up one day I missed due to feverish Beau) and then we'll do a 201 class with our agency. So far so good. Still leaning in and praying and hoping.

(we were designers of a ficticious website/search engine for women. The material with this sort of thing is endless.)

a smidgeon

2010-05-05T22:08:00.000-07:00

We have just completed day two of six of PRIDE training provided by the state. Tonight we talked about attachment and a little about Fetal Alcohol stuff. Did you know that one of the worst things you can do to a fetus is to drink and smoke? Worse than cocaine, heroine, even the toilet bowl that is meth. Both legal too. Very interesting. And the facial symptoms of FAA occur from alcohol abuse during days 19-23 of the pregnancy?

The trainers are capable, experienced and positive and EXCITED that so many people are their to earn their foster licenses. That is cool. It is also hard because I don't see us going this route at this point in our lives, so mentally wading through and keeping the right "lenses" on is a little taxing.

Grief abounds everywhere in this process. It is heavy and real. Losing a parent has tremendous effects on children. The intricacies of attachment to abusive situations feel beyond my experience and comfort in everyway...

and yet...

here we are.

"Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you."

1Peter 5:6,7

2010-04-13T15:16:00.000-07:00

no inspiration. no pictures. just the facts.

-I am eating a oatmeal raisin cookie and drinking licorice spice tea

-It is raining

-we are attending a "101/newbie" class at our adoption agency on Saturday because we are IN!

-I am sleepy, but I am happy. Well, not really happy but I have Joy... and I'll take that any day over "happy"

cheers y'all.

2010-03-28T22:22:00.000-07:00

"What?! Put my sucker down so I can take a nap?! Ahahahahah... you crazy mama!" Also, possibly, "hey check out these two year molar beasts...they are partly the reason for my angst and mood swings."
Monkey see, monkey do. Beau now is quite sophisticated at mimicking his sister. Fascinating. Frustrating. Adorable.

Bradie has never had as much candy since the advent of preschool. In other news, these people now share a room! This is a really big deal for all of us...I thought I would NEVER be ready for this! But on Friday afternoon, I commissioned Marcus and his set of allen wrenches and we moved Beau in! We are on night three, so far so good. Beau even woke up with a fussy fever and Bradie ran out of water last night. Bradie has been very sweet as I have noticed her catch herself several times to change her speech to say "our" room. And I am proud of me- it is hard as woman and a mother to give up control.

Several people have asked if it is for the "new baby". Right now it is for me. It is about giving it up. I have had doubts this weekend here and there, wondering if it is a mistake, but that is so silly and worrisome- millions of people around the world sleep in one room and even in one bed! My two and four year old can certainly share a room. Will they hate it? Sometimes, but it will be but a breath and we will make the switch again I'm sure. Its so hard sometimes as a mom to keep the big picture in mind as you spend day in and day out with these needy, sometimes demented people. It's easy to forget that many of their tears and woes and trials are simple character builders. And to swoop in with permissiveness or rage robs them of a chance to grow just a little bit. Whoa, rant much?

We had our interview and it went well, I think. We should no soon if we are "in".
Nine candles are all we had but it is appropriate for my 29th birthday, I think. It was a spice cake with vanilla frosting made by Marcus. Spice cake is a close second to chocolate, but I am off the sauce for a while due to a self-imposed chocolate hiatus. Appropriate I suppose as this is the beginning of Holy Week- to pause and remember my fallen, addictive, selfish and distracted nature and remember the Holy One who died for us all. Good, good stuff.

Anything else? Ah yes. I scrubbed my kitchen floor today and found an intact, unsprouted head of garlic, hid just so, right behind a leg of the microwave cart. Score!

little by little.... Jesus is changing me!

2010-03-14T20:48:00.000-07:00

Aren't we cute?

The middle picture is one that we sent with our application to our adoption agency a couple of months ago. It is one of the pictures I presume they have been praying over as they considered the "on paper" Merrifields. On March 23rd we will go in for a pre-screening interview to see if we are "accepted" by our agency to move forward in the process.

Our plan, God willing, is to be matched with an "emancipated" child here in Washington State. This is called "foster/adopt", which is not becoming a foster parent but rather adopting out of the foster care system.

I am having a hard time mentally going to the place where I admit that "my" child may be alive and around somewhere...so why not just come on out and say it on a blog! :) Phew... and, closely following is the "Oh, Lord..."

There's just SO much to consider and PRAY about with this!!!!

cauliflower, sweet and sour, half an hour... Veggie tales!

2010-03-10T21:36:00.000-08:00

Tonight I made Chicken Parmigiana (spelled that right first try!) and Sauteed Rainbow Chard. I was in foodie heaven. I said several times, muttered actually, to no one in particular, "don't talk to me, I'm eating." Before it was ready, as I stood at my stove covered in pans of various sizes, I even said to Marcus. "Please be prepared to help Beau because I am cooking here. Really, actually cooking so..." It was delicious. Chard?! Who knew?! Okay, lots of people I am sure but it was a revelation to me. A night when vegetarianism makes complete and perfect sense. Ahhhh.

And the ONLY reason I happened to have chard is because we signed on for some organic produced to be delivered by a farm that is a little north of here. I got our box today and it was like Christmas morning as I unwrapped the pretty produce. This week it contained the blessed chard of course, asparagus, broccoli, some sweet mini peppers, Romaine, a pineapple, two grapefruits, two blood oranges (!), four roma tomats and five apples. Boo. Ya. All organic. 30 bucks. Yippee!

Clutch in, time to shift. I am getting older and growing up. I am finally seeing some quirky things about me revealed through so many different things in my life- even this box of good from the farm! You see, I would never buy winter greens myself, because I ASSUME I wouldn't even know where or how to begin, then it would sit in the crisper drawer and thus lose all its crispness because I would forget about it and choose potato chips instead. So why bother?

I had actual trepidation about even signing up because nagging at the back of my mind is "Sara, you will flake out. You will forget. No one will like the stuff anyway. It will be a waste of money. It will prove a failure." Can you believe that?!

I recently had a blessed opportunity to be with my friend Maggie for a few days and actually processed this aloud for the first time... I have a tremendous fear of failure. I order my life as best I can so that I will never experience rejection or failure. It weaves it way into lots of things- even as I type this I am thinking of more instances. Even with my dearest people, when I absolutely MUST ask for help I do it in a way that will make it so easy for them to say no. It spares me. It makes the fall only an inch or two with only slight bruising, if any.

I am learning this is a stressful way to live. And as a woman of faith it is an opposing way to live. It is a life of no faith. Last fall our smallish group read a book called Crazy Love by Frances Chan. Talk about a book full of tall orders! To me, the crux, the question of the book was this: Are you going to live your life as if God doesn't really exist? Are you going to live taking risks of faith where only He can provide and come through? It challenged how we live out our faith in our culture as well. I can speak for our group members when I say it gave us a ton to think and talk and pray about!

It was an important book for me because last October as I was sitting at Bible study at church I felt what I can only describe as a mighty, rushing wind blow through my insides as I listened to Chip Ingram preach about the deep love of God. And I knew in that moment that I was supposed to have another child. That despite all my trepidation and fear and recorded anxieties in my own journal, I had more room in my soul to love another a child. And the kicker: an orphaned child. WHAT?! I know, me too. Are you kidding me? I can scarcely write about this still!

So there it is. Out there. There is of course more of the journey and the story to share, but I believe my posts from last spring/summer and the crazy miraculousness I witnessed, may explain. It is breathtaking for me to go back and read them, as I now see it as a seed planted. God using circumstances the way only He can to educate me, chide me, bless me and soften me to the tenderness in His own heart towards the fatherless.

I am not sure what else to say at this point. Quite honestly, I feel as though I have an egg in my throat at this very moment! It's just.... a lot. There's so many questions, doubts, fears, threats that I must simply trust God. There is very little that I can do here except to fling myself, cast myself like a toddler off a diving board into my Father's arms. And for the girl who's afraid to buy unusual produce... its the tallest order yet :)

joyeux anniversaire beau mon cher...

2010-03-04T22:49:00.000-08:00

Can you believe this little monkey is two? I sure cannot. He's my sweet baby. He's my big boy. I can't believe I was scared to even have a boy...I clearly remember feeling terrified during the ultrasound!

Good thing we don't get to make these decisions, eh?

Thanks be to God, who knitted this little one so perfectly together in my reluctant womb, whose wisdom and giving of good gifts is the direct opposite of my shifty and fretful heart.

sweethearts

2010-02-15T07:14:00.000-08:00

Last evening my children attended their own Valentine's Party at the Schwenkes and had a great time! I did Bradie's hair circa 1998 and it looked so cute. This girl has really good hair so far. I mean seriously, too too cute. Marcus and I had a nice little date. We weren't this cute by any means but I think we appreciate the whole thing way more...so thanks friends!
Fancy Nancy indeed!
This is a picture I snapped after we got home late one night and just HAD to have a bowl of cereal before retiring. I was shuffling about, tidying up and such, when I came around the corner to a "moaning" daughter. That cereal must have been good! For those who can claim any intimate acquaintance with my kids know of the this "moaning" and if not, well, you are missing out friends!

3:19 pm, the tail end of nap time...

2010-02-08T15:16:00.000-08:00

Only TWO more JV games this week!

I just made myself a cup of coffee because we are attending one of the aforementioned games this evening. It has half and half in it. It is delicious. I think my Chemicalmate, I mean Coffeemate, days are over.

A "real" post will be coming soon!

proud wife

2010-01-31T21:43:00.001-08:00

Marcus blogged. Its a good one, too. Check it out this instant.

on the lighter side....

2010-01-22T15:44:00.001-08:00

Bradie was practicing her bike skills when some neigborhood boys came out with Nerf dart guns. She ran inside, got a fuzzy duck puppet that quacks "Old McDonald" and "Are you Sleeping?"

I asked her, "what are getting?"

holding up the duck puppet she says "This! This will stress them out!"

2010-01-21T06:33:00.000-08:00

A friend of a friend is there:

http://apparentproject.blogspot.com/

They've been in Haiti for awhile doing what they can...and now...well, you must simply go and read about it. Amazing.

Oh, Lord we press into You.

Christmas 2009

2010-01-15T21:11:00.000-08:00

Whew! Sorry....January's been a little busy so far! For those who are unaware we spent Christmas away from home at Seabrook. I was wary of being away from home (or my in laws home) for Christmas but this was SO lovely! Seabrook is about 40 minutes north of Ocean Shores and it is BEAUTIFUL unlike Ocean Shores. I love the ocean. Its humbling beauty is something I could stare at for hours. I feel small in its grandeur and I think that is a very good thing. One cannot help but be in awe of the Creator.

The kids did well and had a great time. Beau was pretty sick but on the mend by the time we arrived and I was doing better after contracting pink eye two nights before! But all was well and most notably there was NOT a cloud in the sky the entire time! ON the OCEAN! IN Washington State!!! It was butt cold though, as evidenced by my children actually wearing hats :)

I received a most outstanding gift as well from my mother in law. She made me a book.... of this blog!!! Every entry starting at the beginning, which I gathered is quite a feat. It is truly one of the most precious gifts I have ever received- Thank you, Janie! She told me I would cry as she handed me the package. Well, I did. And I have since then too :)

Being known and loved for who you are by your mother in law is a wonderful gift.

Thanks God :)

air guitar, anyone?

2009-12-31T18:24:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I feel like taking those old records off the shelf.

This is our business tonight this last day of 2009. Whether it is risky or not...well, you must tune in next year to judge for yourself! :)

I will post about our fabulous Christmas soon!

Happy New Year to all!

2009-12-22T21:24:00.000-08:00

HAPPY MERRY BESTEST CHRISTMAS TO ALL!!! Consider this an E-card. No a BlogCard. No a Bard....nope. How about a Clog? ;)

Cheers! Hoping that you may think upon the true wonder of this season and answer the call to

"let every heart prepare Him room"

or, as Bradie would have it

"Happy Birthday, Jesus!"

2009-12-09T20:25:00.000-08:00

The truth is that life is quite rich and it is only because of complacency and fear that I can never settle down to write about it. Right before bedtime, I read an emailed link from my friend Lori entitled The Invisible Woman. Its by Nicole Johnson and you can google it if you want as I don't feel like putting a link in right now. I barely made it through my six lullabies to Bradie without my voice quivering. The story sums up the plight of the Invisible Woman that she is not invisible at all, but that God does indeed see ALL that she does in her life for her family.

There are days-boy, are there days- where I don't "hear" one nice thing said to me. At all. There are days when I find myself immersed in infuriating battles of logic (or non-logic) with a four year old who has no idea the rules she's breaking are actually for her good and, most of the time, for her happiness as well. Somedays there's never any bull-free time in this China shop!

So the metaphor from The Invisible Woman crushes me. Cathedrals. Apparently no one knows who really built those great cathedrals because they took so painstakingly long to complete.

Many builders died before they saw their work complete.

And the thing I can barely grasp is that my current life's work may be exactly the same. No one "sees" me, no one "knows" all the details of it except for Him. And that raises up in me these feelings that I cannot name or much less contain quickly enough to express.

The comfort in this is that God is real. Really real. That truth makes "those days" actually make sense, and I am encouraged to pick it up again tomorrow because His mercies really are new everyday. There is no way that I can be sitting here in sweats, hair unwashed, glitter all over my kitchen floor, after a day of very little respect and be so...filled that I feel like I will explode if I don't say that my God is real. And He is good.

Amen.

mini Daddy of course, but....

2009-11-14T12:31:00.000-08:00

See any similarities?

Cleaning out the cedar chest and came across some baby pictures of yours truly.

Also, do the Antique Roadshow people take Zyrtec or Benadryl or SOMETHING because between the 1942 wedding gown that was Grandma's and the five mink stole, I am a sneezing mess.

Another gem: my CAT test scores from 1st grade. Oh, the good ol days! I listened to Alanis Morissette's Jagged Little Pill while doing all this also :) It's a variety show around here today!

making like a baby

2009-11-05T11:32:00.000-08:00

and heading out! Marcus and I are going on a half-day date in a couple of hours. Down to seatown, go to a concert, spend the night and leave for work bright and early. Thanks mom for the child care- your rate is so easy on the pocketbook! ;)

In other news...Maggie has a blog, Maggie has a blog, Maggie has a blog hey hey hey hey!!!!! My dearest kindred spirit has launched her blog and you can read thoughts from her excellent mind here: lynchclan.blogspot.com She really is quite splendid.

Cheers!

so long baby mullet

2009-11-03T13:36:00.000-08:00

With most milestones, I come to a place where I make like Nike and "just do it". I hem and haw and feel sentimental and then, I'm just DONE. Whoa, I never really pieced that together like that before...anyway, Beau did well and kinda zoned out for his first stint in the big chair. It was time too as his locks are fuzzy most of the time. He is just so handsome now.
The title of this photo is ghettoflections :-) The high-voltage power pole near my house looks down right poetic reflected in a mud puddle surrounded by plastic litter.

Today I did some 30 day Shred with Bradie, who did practically the whole thing! During a shadow boxing sequence, Bradie simply remarks "...her eyebrows." Yes, Bradie I would not want to be on the business end of Jillian's eyebrows.

Something new: drawing. Bradie is drawing, drawing, drawing with markers! She also is working really hard at her letters and can write her name! I'll try and take picture of one of the many masterpieces lying around here. This brings up a question now:

What do I do with all these?!

yo mom

2009-10-28T22:55:00.000-07:00

So I've spent a few Wednesdays this fall playing in a kickball league and tonight was the final hurrah as we played the #1 seed and thus lost.

BUT...

I assisted a TRIPLE play! Okay so I am no good at kickball. Eye/foot coordination is not my, uh, gifting??? Anyway, I can play volleyball...so what's a centerfielder to do when a sandy, wet kickball flies her way? She assumes serve receive and passes (read: bumps) the ball to the shortstop! Who tags a runner and then throws it to second or something...I missed it because I was incapacitated with laughter and shock.

To our credit our little 8th seed team made a little run and produced some offense... it was not a blow out! Which is almost like a victory for The Lagers:-)

All this to say, this post and that play was dedicated to my mom who did have an actual triple play once at shortstop. She was like the shiz at softball in her day.

I love you dearly, Mom.

I never said I'd be Posty Posterson or anything

2009-10-24T22:02:00.000-07:00

Sorry to anyone who has been waiting with bait breath for me to post (imagine, breath that smells like...bait) Well, now you may move on with your lives! Isn't my witty sarcasm refreshing on this Saturday night? Thought so...

This guy is getting big! All at once bigger, naughtier, lovelier and more fun. I still want to suck his cheeks off because he is just too cute for his own good. Sometimes I think Beau literally stinks. Then I realize his little face simply smells like my own spit. Can a kid OD on kisses?
Here we are for Bradie's first field trip with her preschool to the pumpkin farm.

And here is my beautiful girl. This is the smile she gives when she is fully in the moment of enjoying herself. It is splendidly candid. She looks this way when I tickle her neck or make jokes that surprise her. She is just starting to realize that her mother appreciates a good funny. Oh Bradie...you have no idea!

What else? Oh crap! Bradie had a birthday don't ya know... she's four now. She keeps asking and insinuating that she's almost five. Maybe I'll post some birthday pics. We roll kinda simple on the birthday scene stuff... we did cake, a few presents, spent a fabulous weekend with cousins and grandparents. Next year we'll rent the Space Needle or something to make up for my lack of desire to plan a kid party...can you smell my mommy guilt? ;)

Last night we went as a family to watch the Meadowdale Mavericks play some football. A covered stadium praise the Lord and we went to DQ afterwards for a treat. Beau consumed his first ice cream cone and his intensity at eating it made my heart ache with what I call mommy consumption. Sometimes when I catch my kids in a moment worth noting, it makes my heart ache and feel very heavy in my chest whilst tears of joy start to well in my eyes... it's one of my favorite parts of this whole life I find myself living. A life I didn't plan and could not have forseen...

Thank you God.

Well, she did it...

2009-09-15T21:53:00.000-07:00

Before as Christy does Bradie's hair...she is SO good for Christy! It makes me mad...for like two seconds. Seeing that precious face is worth it!

Dropping your kid off at school is such a huge range of emotions the only thing I can find to compare it to is actually BIRTHING the little human in the first place! Okay maybe that is dramatic, but if you've read my last post, it makes sense. Speaking of that post, soon after I went and picked blackberries with the kids and now have a freezer full of black/raspberry jam. Tremendous help to my funk.

Anyway, enough about me! Bradie did great today, no tears, no dramas, just her happy-go-lucky self after that brief "Bradieweariness" wore off! I am proud and EXHAUSTED as I realized much of my angst as of late had direct relation to this milestone. Sigh. A happy, relieved sigh. So far so good. And that is good enough for me right now.

Man, these pictures really are pathetic! But those mommy images I have tucked away are pretty priceless and I can still hear her little voice say "I think I'll miss you at preschool mommy"

blech

2009-09-10T13:09:00.000-07:00

happy "new year"! Teacher culture and life celebrates the end of shaggy, unshaven fancy freeness and the beginning of new possibilities that STRUCTURE can bring! But, oh, the adjustment. It is hard around here in Merryweather land. Marcus comes home quite glazed this first week or so and it is challenging to get all the things done I would like. Out of perspective this can actually turn into much anxiety and a general tearfulness for me. Pathetic right? I know! It is crazy. This morning I woke at 4:50 (thanks Marcus' alarm!) and instantly begin running through birthday ideas for Bradie. If I weren't half asleep I probably would have had a panic attack! Sometimes not having a "real" job is tremendously hard. Like floating in a dinghy in a boundless ocean. Being able to do "anything" is such a tall order sometimes. I don't want to be a driven busybody of a mom but I don't want to waste my days either. I want to savor life, I want fruit, I want to be intentional with my kids. But I also want a clean desk and to not waste my precious, limited closet space. I want to find time each day to be in God's Word. I want to lose the 8 pounds I've gained since weaning Beau....blech.

Kinda journal-y for this blog, but sometimes keepin' it real is the only way. So there, anxieties cast out upon the One who cares with a side of gritty update. Order up.

beauflex

2009-09-02T13:22:00.000-07:00

Happy 18 months little man!

Giving your child a name of a very common sound is just too much fun sometimes. The past two days I have heard Bradie call her brother "Beaubadyer" which is very similar to something that daddy calls him (Beaubadiah) and it kills me because she uses her sympathetic sister voice and eyebrows* both times she's said it.

Let's see, Beau's latest tricks: climbing on chairs in the kitchen, climbing on the toilet to reach the deodorant, climbing to try and reach for knives....see a pattern? At least he can't be sneaky! The sound of a dining table chair being dragged across the kitchen is, thanks be to God, unmistakable. So welcome to round two of toddler foolhardy naughtiness!

Positively, welcome to fun games, sweet kisses and giggles and the general yumminess that is Beau of the past. Now add some true personality and you have the verdict: the kid rocks, people!

*you don't know Bradie until you know her eyebrows!

Bradie says

2009-08-24T19:30:00.000-07:00

Dear Jesus,

Help me

to do

all things

You do.

Amen

Marcus, Brad and David Gray...

2009-08-17T15:08:00.000-07:00

were my favorite guys on the planet Saturday! I think that concert traditions are a good thing and everyone should start one. With our dear Brad, we have a wonderful tradition that involves David Gray. We went to our third show on Saturday and it was great! The guy just does not disappoint. The point and shoot digicam isn't robust enough for capturing much at night but I was able to use the timer thanks to two tupperwear containers and the Thermarest to capture us waiting on the grassy knoll and the people behind us before they were schnockered (I spelled that correctly the first time!)

biergarten!
Here's my chaco tan
It was an acoustic show. The performers were slightly dwarfed by the stage.
We really are this happy here. I had a hard time taking this picture and took a few that were mostly Brad and I.
This was to extinguish Marcus' jealousy over the cute pictures of Brad and I. Those who know Marcus well will recognize the position of his mouth and know he's mumbling some curmudgeon-y here.

So here's to tradition! Here's to Shows with Brad! Here's to David Gray and guitars and pianos! Viva!

quotable

2009-08-16T17:25:00.000-07:00

At the beginning of this dialogue I was not paying attention. Marcus mentioned something about "hush money" to Bradie but did not explain it to her(he gets infinite pleasure over joking over her head).

With a sidelong glance and a lowered voice she says: "Do you know about hush money?"

I started to giggle at her expression and if that wasn't enough she adds: "is that money for when you're sleeping?"

not even close to kidding

2009-08-06T14:49:00.001-07:00

I decided to take a nap while Bradie watched a movie with Daddy and while Beau was taking his own nap. Right at the tail end of my siesta Bradie came into my room and asked what I was doing. I told her I was sleepy and that I needed to rest. Then she said she was going to lay in her box and rest. Whatev, I thought and I must have drifted off again. Ten minutes later Beau piped in on the monitor, just waking up. Bradie's door was closed. I peeked in and sure enough... she was asleep in a box.

I snapped these photos at 1/5 of a second because she actually darkened her own room! They are blurry but so very precious. Not worth letting the flash fire... this kid doesn't nap anymore, so I'm not messin' with that!

summer snippets

2009-07-31T20:02:00.000-07:00

This is the picture I put in last and it comes up first. That last statement was for me, not you, dear reader. Dear Reader?! Who do I think I am Dear Abby?!
Okay, so inspired by my go-getter friend Christy, who is so good at getting the heckfire out of her house, we made some short notice plans with the Lynchs and went on over to Spokane to visit. I took a PATHETIC amount of pictures but here IS a good one of Casey, as well as Maggie. Casey is the strapping fellow and Maggie is the pretty lady up on the wall just to the left. Can you believe Casey painted that?! I suggest clicking on this one folks. It is a good thing that Maggie is so down to earth because I'm pretty sure my ego could not take seeing my mug all over the house. Seriously, this guy is good, people! Maybe a plug or maybe I just love my dear friends!
Okay. So always take home those little mini-hoses they have in shoe stores. They happen to fit perfectly on toddler heads. Add a too big button up shirt and you have the 90's all over again. Party on.
So what is better than snuggling with your Auntie to watch a June thunderstorm? I know, not much.

At bedtime tonight, the temperature of the nursery was 80 degrees. This was thrilling. It got down to 75 this morning!! And to think six weeks ago, I would have freaked out if it was 75 in there at NIGHT! I am acclimated and am moving to Louisiana...

PSYCHE!!

And the best for last: last night we had some folks I went to high school with over for dinner (the Backlunds, hooray!) and it was great, but the best part was the following conversation I had with Bradie:

sort of talking to herself and to me she says "motha"

I say, "where'd you learn that Bradie? On the street?"

Bradie, quizzically, says "Sesame Street?"

oh, Sweet Pea, won't you dance with me?

2009-07-21T12:09:00.000-07:00

I know, four pictures of flowers, but I grew these from seed for the first time this year and I am a proud mama :) Plus I am having a rough day today and what better way to cheer up then cutting, arranging and SMELLING these girls! Love it!

fractured Cinderella (and out of order too!)

2009-07-15T07:42:00.000-07:00

Here's his grace, the Duke.

Cinderella says "ha ha! The shoes do not fit you wicked stepmother!"

BOING! The Duke's monocle is knocked from his eye by the shoe that does not fit the evil stepmother/photographer.

Cinderella, the princess, is overjoyed to learn she will live happily ever after!

THE END

hello stranger

2009-07-13T21:02:00.001-07:00

well it is a week for reunions for me. On Saturday I trek down to the Gig to attend my 10 year high school reunion. Whoa (like Joey on Blossom). I am looking forward to it. Should be interesting at the very least. I have harangued some good friends into going so at the very least it should be fun to see them. And meet their husbands :)

I don't know why but I keep thinking that various other people should go to, random people. Like some friends from DTS and Summer Staff and Brad and Brady and Mark and Lori and Mags, basically if all of my small group could come with me, now that would be fabulous.... basically people that have been a part of my last ten years, I want them there too. THAT would make it the complete package weekend of remembrance. Impossible I know but this girl, whose love language is time, can dream right?

I really annoy myself that I don't blog more. Right now the vice that prevents writing is How I Met Your Mother Seasons One thru Three on generous loan from SIL Caren (who has MOVED TO OLYMPIA, PRAISE JESUS!) Marcus and I are currently addicted... he actually just walked in from being gone all day at basketball camp and asked, "Wanna watch some How I Met Your Mother?"

Okay, so you are probably like "blah blah blah Sara, where are pics of the wee ones?" I will post some of those soon too. And give you a couple vignettes. Beau has four molars and can climb onto the couch. This afternoon he actually stepped straight off the couch and ATE it. Poor Dude! He is also very jibberjabbery and has the most expressive lips often thrusting them out in a hyperpucker when concentrating. Bradie got the expressive eyes and Beau has this funny little mouth that tells a story. He also gives real hugs now that are beyond precious.

Bradie is doing well. She is very sassy and disrespectful at times and we are working on that. It is very hard actually. I pray for wisdom all day and for patience and try to ask her "what is going on in your heart, Bradie?" She asked for some privacy to pray the other day and I do all in my power to remember the sweetness of that moment and to let it encourage me to keep runnin' that race! She is also very tan and very blonde and if she looks like this at fifteen we are in for it :)

I think that is all for now. Pictures soon. We really should talk more often.

whoa

2009-06-08T21:15:00.001-07:00

If you haven't, please check out Amber and Andrew's Blog about THEIR son, Levi!

So tonight my walk was one of celebration. And the brown bunny was back again in his powerline meadow, enjoying a fuchsia sun sinking into the horizon.

I am still smiling! Here's to believing God!

stop and smell my blog

2009-06-07T21:17:00.000-07:00

I just went on a four mile sunset walk. Why this is my first one of the season is an embarrassment and a mystery. But my swollen heart finally forced me out to pound the pavement and sing praise. Sometimes the praise was in my heart and sometimes it slipped out. The brown bunny that lives in the blackberry bushes near my house may have heard me.

Sometimes I feel so giddy with God that I feel...skippy...school girlish... what is the word I seek here? So with all the responsibilities of my life I don't have chances to chase these feelings, to dwell in them, to turn my cheek up and out to receive that holy kiss unique to these sweet moments. But tonight I did.

My thoughts kept coming back to a sweet little boy I met a few weeks ago, without a home, without a mommy and a daddy to cherish him. I stared at that little face, dumbfounded... God where is his mommy?! I could kick my heels still thinking about this little boy NOW- placed by the hand of the Father into a home with a mom and a dad to LOVE him!

And now with the same exuberance of faith I am praying along with so many others for another little boy. He's waiting. In an orphanage. In Ethiopia. And my friends are waiting here for him, their arms empty but full of a kind of faith that seems excruciating and beautiful all at once. The hinge here is locating the birth mom. I know her name and I pray for her everyday, that she is okay, that she is blessed, that God's angels have her surrounded and will lead her to a place where the people that need to locate her can.

Savior,

He can move the mountains.

My God is mighty to save...

Forever

Author of Salvation

He rose and conquered the grave

Jesus conquered the grave

It can be done.

hamantaschen...

2009-05-19T09:34:00.000-07:00

I don't usually do this, but Ellen is kind of a blogger hero of mine and I know she'll appreciate a food post.

Half the batch looks like this...

And half look proper like this... please ignore the Life cereal peaking out :)
Man! This dough is crumbly! Not that I was expecting pie pastry but WOW! I kept thinking I should have added more fat, or a splash of milk or another egg... but they taste pretty good. Maybe its the whole wheat flour. Hindsight internet research has shown me my missteps that I can rectify if I ever make this again.

I kind of like these alot....trying not to OD on the prune puree!

Also Ellen, I would like to know what your favorite companion book is to P&P. I'd love to read some professional analysis. Cheers!

2009-05-18T20:15:00.000-07:00

Beau's first Oreo!
We went on a hike this past, glorious Saturday. The temperature was perfect, Beau took a morning nap, Bradie was wearing pants... the only hitch in our giddy-up was that we were about 4 weeks early for this hike. Our car couldn't even make it to the trail head because of some deep snow patches tucked into the remaining spring shade. We walked for a while and then hit a snow FIELD and had to turn around. Some hardcore-types told us they used snow shoes for that section. Oh well, it was still a great day meandering on the Mountain Loop highway along the (stillaguamish?) river.

On our way up some glimpse of the north cascades would come into view and I would excitedly point them out to Bradie. Appreciation for beautiful mountains was instilled in me by my parents. That and also birds of prey... yes I am the crazy lady swerving on the freeway because she's sure that's a bald eagle circling overhead! Seriously my mom has lived in Gig Harbor for almost 35 years and she will still tell me "you should have seen the mountain today!" I love it.

***ETA***

After I hustled this post I consumed some How I Met Your Mother and finished my Esther study. I was so inspired that I traipsed (in the dark too, and silently, like a ninja) downstairs and did the prep for Hamantashen, or Haman's hat. Yes, I am two months late for Purim. Yes, I am a Gentile. But Beth Moore has this recipe in the back of her book and I am weak when it comes to NOT trying something new that I have all the ingredients for! I even had prunes! (I tried to tell my anti-pooping daughter that they were giant raisins. No dice.) I am excited to do the cookie cutting and prune butter placing while explaining to Bradie about how God delivered his people from the wicked Haman. Haman was hanged on a gallows he prepared for Mordecai, an upstanding Jew. There's that saying about eating your hat and all.

On an unrelated note: I have been really into Pride and Prejudice lately. I watch segments here and there. I cannot get enough of this story. The night before last I paused during a scene so I could explain a theory to Marcus about why Caroline Bingley is such a nastigram. I was very into my analysis and I am sure you can picture his incredulous look. I informed him that this is like how Star Wars is to some people and my enthusiasm is healthy. Or maybe I need to find a new book to read.

But I just cannot get over the grace. The unearned, self-sacrificing covering over is transcendently romantic to me. I catch my breath every time. So it is much more to me than Colin Firth and his bedroom eyes. So roll your eyes world (Marcus?!) but P&P is here to stay!

2009-05-09T21:11:00.000-07:00

I reckon you don't know the Sheriff of Cute. Beware folks he's not a crooked cop but he does have his price... bananas, yogurt and your cell phone might save your life should you dare to cross him. Here's a rare shot of him in his birthday uni. After the bottom photo was captured he actually said to me:

"Lady, you take one more shot of me and I will unload on this couch that is a promise!"

It is serious, Chuck Norris-grade cuteness.

***

There are so many things lately that have crossed my life and mind that I found myself saying to, uh, myself pay attention this is excellent blogfodder. All sorts of quips and nuggets... maybe I do need an iPod touch to record these wims... just kidding, Marcus!

First an update: Thanks to my dear husband and Maggie's frequently flying aunt, I was able to go to Spokane by myself a couple of weeks ago. There I met and snuggled the sweet Lucy baby. SO precious! But even more important I got spend many uninterrupted hours conversing with my dear Maggie. I always walk away from time with her enlightened and blessed- she has a great deal of wisdom and wonderful stories that she never seems too busy to share with me. I could go on and on about Maggie, but I might start to get a little sad that we are so far apart and flood the keyboard!

So what about today? The men folk in our small group decided to play some hoops and take the kids with them! A couple of the corresponding ladies and myself dined at a quaint restaurant in Snohomish and did some meandering. I didn't have to help either one of them finish their breakfasts nor watch them like hawks while in the antique stores- I can't tell you what I treat that is!

Then Marcus replaced one of our back gutters. This is huge. The old gutter produced a drip that sounded like a Barbie was outside hanging pictures in her dream house ALL NIGHT LONG! He had invaluable help from one of the men folk, Troy and I was able to make a dairy free Boston Cream Pie which is actually quite tasty. In case you are curious (Deena!) soy milk custard sets up quite nicely, although soy milked cakes STILL taste dry to me. Whatever. That chocolate top makes up for it. Marcus also found a screen door that fits our back slider and I will most likely have to give up my summer sport of fly swatting to actually scrap book or use my sewing machine.

Oh and Happy Mother's day to all the moms out there! I guess this made up holiday's not SO bad.

zoo? why for?

2009-04-20T19:47:00.000-07:00

baby birds nesting in the laundry basket.

Okay, simmer down, baby birds!

Do NOT feed the wild animals. It will cause them to become aggressive and assumptive.

just an update

2009-04-11T11:34:00.000-07:00

Well we've been home from Spring Break for officially 8 days and I am now just writing this. Spokane was a great time, low key with lots of time spent with loved ones, mainly Grandma and Grandpa Martin and our dear Lynch "family".

And wouldn't you know that rascal Maggie "decided" to have her baby Wednesday April 1st about 12 hours AFTER we left Spokane! The nerve right?! No I am excited for Lucy Lauren is a breathing citizen now and decided to leave the womb a whole week before her due date. She must really love her mommy!

Maggie and I got some good quality time in before this of course, which included giant onion rings from none other than The Onion. We also had play time with the kiddos, where our daughter's became fast friends. Good stuff.

It was also special to see Bradie and Beau interact with Grandma Mary and Grandpa Stan, especially Bradie who didn't speak for about two hours after we arrived. Don't worry she busted out the charm soon after and enjoyed her week, which included a date with Daddy to her first movie on the big screen. Candy and soda completed the experience. Beau did well there also, walking better than he did the morning we left! Its like a little switch went off in his brain. He still cannot stand on his own without something vertical to help him, but I expect this switch will flip soon. He is also now totally weaned, which is a bittersweet relief.

We then journeyed to Grandma Janie and Papa Dave in Tumwater to say hello and pick up the dog which they generously baby sat for the duration of the Spokane trip...

And now we're back! For Easter and to see Auntie Caren who is visiting from Virginia. The only shadow is Grandma Janie is resting in a hospital bed after unexpectedly needing a few feet of small intestine removed! Crazy! If you are inclined to make any Petitions for a speedy recovery on her behalf, please do so.

Tomorrow we will ride back up to Gig Harbor to sup with my family and watch the kiddos hunt for eggs.

Let's see... I am finding some joy in gardening these days. We planted a window box and I have seeds sown...so fingers crossed! Beau loves to be outside and will beeline for any open door. He and Bradie have been known to hold hands in the car. They did so all the way to church last week. I took very few photos in Spokane but I will post those soon.

2009-04-06T09:49:00.000-07:00

Last night Bradie and I are saying good night in her room. its dark and low key. Suddenly she says,

"Elmo doesn't have a real butt. It's not real. There's a hand."

So I say "yes, Elmo is a puppet. There's a man who makes Elmo sing and dance."

"He doesn't have a line like this", she says as she rolls over and points between her little cheeks.

Wow.

2009-03-19T10:29:00.000-07:00

I love giving Bradie the camera once and awhile. I just need to check and make sure its off manual so the camera can select a different depth of field on its own.
Apparently they use helicopters to add new phone lines. It was bizarre. All day long, intermittently, it felt like we were on MASH. I kept thinking about that Chris O'Donnell/Mt Everest movie where you see the helicopters struggling in the thin air... obviously not thin down here, but watching the precision hovering made me nervous. Oh well. The kids liked it. Bradie also says "helleecopter" and sounds very British, which makes me smile.

I'm off to by some pseudoephedrine as I could not procure any last night at 2 am when we REALLY needed it :( Beau is a snotty, nonsleeper right now. I'm assured he will not use any to help produce methamphetamines... although granite falls is just down the road.

2009-03-05T20:48:00.000-08:00

Beau's one year visit was today! I am just beside myself at how fast his first year came and went! I had to post a one year pic of Bradie just because I love how different they look yet you can still see the relation and I MUST remind myself that Bradie was once a baby too...although this is beginning to fade into memory :(

Beau's stats as follows:

20 pounds 5 ounces 14%

29 1/2 inches 40%

46 cm head circumference 38%

Little man! Okay so I pulled up Bradie's one year stats today and they measured the EXACT same in length and Bradie was 3 ounces heavier at one year!

What tickles me the most is that their laughs are on their way to being identical :)

Gotta go hit record.... its Office time!

2009-03-01T06:54:00.000-08:00

Check out my little weaner! :) On Thursday I replaced Beau's rather pathetic afternoon nursing with a cup of milk. Took like a charm. This has been the fastest year of my life, yesterday being a whirlwind. Grandpa Dave and Grandma Janie came to visit and got Bradie a new car seat so we could upgrade little mister to her FORWARD facing seat! He looks so tiny in it!

And later that afternoon Beau stood and clapped his hands THEN took three steps to Grandma Janie!

Big day.

2009-02-15T20:04:00.000-08:00

To OUR friend, Tiny Pink Blankie:

thank you for the timeless snuggles even after you became scratchy when mommy washed you with Oxi Clean.

You were our favorite pretend prop, excellent for swaddling dollies and monkeys as well as being held in place with a crown when we play "married".

You smelled like morning breath that ONLY a mother can love.

You made parenting easier when the overtired stage was reached.

You were privvy to the Tokio weigh station jokes and our stops at the Moses Lake Burger King.

You watched Fairytopia and Clifford with her when I couldn't bear to.

I know it never hurt your feelings when people

joked about how stinky and pathetic you became.

I like to think at the final resurrection you will show up fresh, and a true Pink

that will never fade :)

You never really got what the big deal was about that baby anyway...

Can you believe that I, a grown woman, am weeping as I type this? I'm not sure I am cut out for this parenting gig... to see your child heart broken feels unbearable. And this about a BLANKET for crying out loud! What the heck I am going to do as Bradie gets older and the stakes get higher?!

Out the window it went on the interstate. Marcus and I both did a down and back over the suspected section, but no luck. Numbly I drove Bradie and myself to Edmonds to a baby boutique. I was out of my mind and should have just went to Target here but I had to look myself...

The amazing blessing is that she is really doing okay. We are on night #2 and she even took a nap today with our new replacement. But momma knows. She's a little off. So know I pray and watch and talk if she wants to, I suppose. I'm a little sad I won't be able to pull the thing out when she's 20 and embarrass her with its funk and dingyness...

So with all deaths, even minideaths that we'll most likely chuckle over someday, I am looking for the teachable moment. Maybe Bradie will understand in a deeper way the father's heart as he gazes over his land, looking for his wayward son in the distance.

2009-02-11T07:32:00.000-08:00

Bee line for the camera... I love using a 50 mm but its hard with kids and FAST crawlers. I told him no and kept him at bay with my foot, hence this priceless, whiny face.

A boy and his...Swiffer? Apparently it is an agape sort of love.
Thanks Cousin Meg for giving us your old iBook. Meg is the normal sort of person who upgrades every few years when her computer slows down and becomes quirky....Marcus is the sort of person who will rip its guts out and put in new guts. Here's Marcus after removing the back case of the iBook which I quickly found out is NOT easy and can break the whole darn thing. He got it off without using a Spudger (a little rubbery nail file type thing) which makes him pretty awesome. I played the role of assistant, scotch taping carefully TINY screws to a labelled chart he printed of the internet.

"what happens if you put the wrong screws in the wrong place?"- me, the simpleton

"you can screw through the logic (mother) board."- marcus, the apple surgeon.

gotta go, Beau is going up the stairs....

2009-01-28T20:48:00.000-08:00

Here you go Mom. She always calls me when things quiet down and reminds me to post something.
She was mad because I wouldn't give her the lens I just took off the camera.
I know the snot is totally gross but this is a typical Beau shot here and one I've been trying to capture forever. Thank you colds and open mouth breathing!
Here's Bradie in a silk slip she unearthed from my drawers. Her latest thing is to wear my stuff. In my t-shirts she looks like a Hogwarts reject.

With a tape (yes, I still live in 1990) in VCR for LOST, I am off to Narnia and then to bed. I just finished The Magician's Nephew and will begin The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe tonight! LOVE IT!

post brought to you by Super Why :)

2009-01-07T09:00:00.000-08:00

Hey there self: the last uploaded photo will show up first, remember that next time! Anyway here is a keepin it real shot to begin with. Beau's expression slays me!

Happy 10th month little man! Beau is finally realizing how fun it is to walk around with his hands held. He gets this determined little grin that melts my heart, probably more so if all the blood wasn't rushing to my head as I walk stooping over. Beau has also had YoBaby yogurt for the past three days and appears to be fine- for those who don't know Bradie has some sort of issue with dairy and we're obviously hoping Beau won't have it as well- so far so good!

Lots of other little potpurri: thanks to my wonderful inlaws I am the proud owner of a sewing machine! I bought my first pattern and fabric and whatnot and will attempt a first project very soon. I am planning to build a dress for Bradie. Then I will make something for me!

I am anxiously awaiting some new workout DVD's to appear in the mail to begin to tackle the four pounds put on by those darn holiday treats! I will be submitting myself to Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred and some Rael Pilates, so woohoo! Oprah and her "wagon" couldn't have come at a better time ;) Although it feels good to know I've been at this for awhile and I am not overwhelmed by the whole New Year's resolution junk. I've known success on my own... that is empowering!

We are getting into the nitty gritty of basketball season finally and that is a good thing. I think the coaches and the program were getting pretty antsy with all the snow and game cancellations.

In a week we go down to the orthopedist and have Beau's feet checked and hopefully can rid ourselves of the Bar...should I mention that Beau has gotten himself out of it two nights this week? Turkey.

So there you are. An update. Sorry the rat post was up for so long *sigh*.

If you are not too squeamish...

2008-12-21T13:05:00.001-08:00

head on over to Marcus Weblog for a real treat ;)

Christmas comes early...

2008-12-19T09:40:00.000-08:00

when Daddy gets to stay home and play!

So we all bundled up yesterday, grabbed the camera and headed outside. I snapped some adorable snow pictures only to discover my CF card wasn't in! Sad day! Oh well, we did get to throw some snowballs at our teenage neighbor as he puttered around in his riding lawn mower. I almost got him too.

As I type Bradie and Marcus are at Target picking out some snow gear for her and I will try and recapture some moments I hope. It's not like this snow is going anywhere!

Some blogs of note: Ryan and Melanie have some crazy snow pictures on their blog (if you want to see some REAL snow check out the accumulation in Spokane) and Christy has posted a video of her two year old singing Old McDonald...I don't know why but it gets funnier to me each time I watch it as I catch some new nuance in the vocal stylings of young Kyle. :)

*Non-Sequiter Warning* Yesterday Bradie was watching her reflection in the TV and dancing to the music like Eddie Vedder.

booyah

2008-12-05T18:28:00.000-08:00

And we're back in the game! Thank you Marcus for giving the people what they want :) Check this kid out. I don't know what possessed me to snap these in all Beau's sweet potato glory, but he was just so happy I had to. Good toother shot there as well. Beau is a healthy guy per the PA at his 9 month check up. He is 22 percentile for weight, 60th for length and 42 for head circumference. I did a little comparison and at this age, he is a 1/2 inch taller and about a pound heavier than Bradie was at nine months. And before we left the house for the appointment, Beau climbed over half way up my stairs! This kid is a go-getter, literally.

The other half of our doctor extravaganza week was not so stellar...we have been assigned to 6 more weeks of sleep with the Dennis Brown bar. Yuck. On the bright side, Beau will not ever need any surgical intervention as he is still very flexible (and hello? climbing?!) The doctor said another six weeks is all it should take and then we'll probably have to do some straight last shoes for walking. Then he will attend the University of Alabama and score many touchdowns, run across the country a few times, fall into unrequited love and get shot in the butt and...wait a second...

2008-12-01T19:02:00.000-08:00

Bradie watched an hour and twenty minutes of PBS this morning while I grabbed a much needed work out. Its not my favorite thing but maybe in the big picture it is a nice little siesta for us all- Beau naps, I sweat, Bradie watches some educational television. Win, win, win.

But now that I am fully immersed in the basketball season and the rigors of mostly single parenting on weekdays, I am trying to be intentional about everything. It is exhausting to be this intentional. Of course, the real battlefield is my mind, and I wage war against the temptation of intentionality morphing into perfectionism.

So the evening TV time for Bradie is many things. Also not my favorite thing, popping my kid down in front of the glowing babysitter, but it allows me to nurse the boy down while having some quiet time to gather my thoughts and simply let go of them. It also is a time to gear up for the bed time battle- which, on all cylindars, is more of a bed time ballet, lots of little intricate steps, but it gets done and is done peacefully instead of any gnashing and weeping and carrying on.

Tonight was different. Bradie is experiencing a little regression I like to call poop denial. She knows how to go in the potty but would rather not. And after a day and a half the poop doesn't really want to either. It seems to be comfy in her little nethers, growing more solid each passing hour and can't seem to the hear the whining and definitely cannot feel my nerves beginning to fray. So it sits and has every intention of becoming a diamond, I swear.

So I was not going to put this whiny, pathetic pile of a girl in front of the tube and feed her denial. Now she is aware of the rewards (ice cream AND a movie) but will not choose to go. Now Beau is ready for bed and I tell Bradie to play quietly in her room while I feed her brother, with a promise of story time to follow. No, she INSISTS on laying on my bed with me while I nurse Beau. I feel my blood pressure rise a bit. Fine, I resign through my teeth, but no talking.

And you know what happened? (if your still reading this sprawl of a post, thank you) After only a few little minor incidences, I look down at my daughter and she is breathing very rhythmically. She's asleep! A few minutes after that, she twitched even! Like really, seriously asleep!

The use of exclamation is appropriate here. The readers of this blog who have experienced the ballet/battle with Bradie know that this like never happens. Looking down at her sweet, relaxed expression I wanted to touch her face and absorb some of that repose... but that sort of thing is along the lines of "you break it, you buy it" so I didn't dare.

I laid Beau down and went back to collect Bradie, noting how different suggly baby feels compared to warm, almost sweaty, gangly preschooler. But she wakes and whispers something about a queen and then asks "what are you doing?"

I tell her I am putting her in bed. The princess rolls over, clutches her stinky blanket, finds her thumb and is silent. What a blessing.

***

I was going to post some pictures, but the card reader in the printer is being persnickety. Beau's 9 month check up (can you believe it!?) is tomorrow so I will try and post them then along with the pertinent information. Chuck is on in 15 minutes, I must go and prepare the taping device :)

I am alive...

2008-11-19T14:30:00.001-08:00

sorry I have been a lame blogger. You know, busy and all that. plenty of time for facebook tho *rolls eyes at self*

Also I am coaches widow...er, I mean wife! basketball is upon us all now and this week is try out week which I am told is quite the process. Marcus got home at 10.40 last night.

hunkering down, researching crockpot recipes, trying to eat healthy despite, praying, meditating on the Word, enjoying my sweet kids for Marcus who hasn't see them since Sunday.

I am bringing a sweet potato cheesecake to my small group tonight in practice for thanksgiving. hopefully it turned out.

I will be back soon, with pictures and punctuation not so crappy. Or at least existent. :)

Happy 8th Month beaublueeyes!

2008-11-02T20:38:00.000-08:00

Here is the little scamp looking so sweet...I am having a hard time catching action shots of him sticking his hands in the VCR, finding cords to shake and chew on beneath the computer, and attempting to stand because every time I bust out the camera he'll PANT with excitement and crawl towards me. If you would like to be Beau's BFF just lay on the floor and pull out your cell phone. He'll approach you like a hungry car salesman.

Some stats for you from the boy himself:

I love to be carried close against your chest, only to "kamikaze" out of your arms a second later!

I have metatarsus adductus (think pidgeon toes) and currently spend 9-12 hours a night in a Dennis Brown bar. Sweet...NOT! No actually I have been a very good boy and sleep pretty darn well considering...

I have three teeth!

I WILL walk at nine months unless you send me $100,000 in cash (unmarked bills) and a case of biter biscuits. If you love my mother you will honor these requests.

I bump my head a LOT right now as I am trying so hard to stand next all this big stuff they got lying around. My favorite thing is to watch mom's face as I attempt standing in the bath tub.

And, my big sister is the COOLEST! :)

***
Not a Nerd falls that she does not know about... teehee I love Bible jokes!
We did some Trunk or Treating at church...so fun!

like chandler bing, I do my duties

2008-10-21T15:49:00.000-07:00

Here I am giddy that I have voted. I read carefully (mostly) through the voters pamphlet while eating my small scoop of reduced sugar vanilla ice cream and sipping on exactly five ounces of Fetzer cabernet (which, by the way, is a sturdy amount of wine...I usually eye it but have been low balling myself). Mostly I felt like a child that's been given the keys to a car but hasn't a clue how to drive. There I said it: I am very apolitical. I have a really hard time with all of it, from the campaigning to the debates to the commercials to the countless websites proclaiming the gospel-truth versions of their candidates views and plans. What's a gal to do?

So I went from the bottom up, picking some people who's names I've viewed going sixty miles an hour up 204. Got into a nice flow, feeling very comfortable with my single line, even feeling sassy about my ability to sit down and CHOOSE.

Then I get to the Govenor's race and the Big Dog race. And I pause. I scrape every last drop of that tablespoon of Hershey's chocolate syrup out of my ice cream dish. I drain my wine.

I draw funny mustaches. I hem and haw. I squint. Then I vote, breathing "there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus..." SERIOUSLY, it freaks me out... I almost penned Him in as a write in. But I didn't.

It's a good thing a machine will likely count my vote. A caring person might scratch their head and wonder, "was this person drunk?"

No, but she did drink that wine rather quickly :)

***
Here is another goody from the sixth folder of 2003. I thought it was appropriate for keeping with the autumn festivities. If you can't figure out who I am please click the pic to read the name tag above my head...nevermind, this won't let you click on it. I am Janis Joplin here

aforementioned mustaches: notice that Sarah Palin is still quite womanly, only she is sporting some chin hairs that I've heard happen at certain ages :)

Okay, so here is my 6th photo from my 6th folder as per Christy's tag. This photo was taken in November 2003. This is one of Marcus and my favorite places to escape when we lived in Spokane, the Dishman Hills. Its this crazy little natural area is right next to auto row in the Valley...you could hear the intercoms of some of the car dealerships. I am just glad the 6th photo wasn't one of our countless pictures of Frank.

Sorry the pictures in this blog are such a zoo! Thanks for reading.

Oh and I would LOVE to see what Janie's 6th photo of her 6th folder is...welcome to the bloggy world!

does this sound braggy?

2008-10-15T13:07:00.000-07:00

Bradie had her three year check up yesterday and ROCKED IT! She was a studdette about all the little steps and didn't even cry for her shot...okay she shed some tears afterwards but I was SO proud! She is a shade under 38 inches tall and weighs 31 pounds- 60th for height and weight...perfectly proportionate!

Oh yes and then there's Beau. He CLIMBED onto my aerobics steps! I hear some strange cooing and go out to see him on his belly on the six inch step. Yesterday pulled up two or three times on various objects, one of them being our bottom stair!! Um, is this early? It sure as heck feels like it. Kid's barely 7.5 months old!

Marcus is doing better each day. He has concluded that getting an apple removed from the barrel is far easier that wisdom teeth extraction. Perhaps it is because cancer seems to allow you the choice and inspiration to be a hero throughout it all. Darn that Lance and his yellow bracelets. A little Zofran and you can eat M&M's!

Sorry...I think I am tired or something.

Peace out.

For Erin and others

2008-10-10T07:52:00.000-07:00

Please believe me when I say that I have been trying to blog all week. But this week has proved to be a doozy! On Monday afternoon, Marcus had his wisdom teeth removed. He had them taken out by a dentist who specializes in extractions and was not put under for the procedure. Of course his teeth went out fighting. Like a soap opera actress who is ten years past her prime but is part of show fabric, this one tooth had settled quite comfortably into Marcus's jaw...they cut into the artery in his jaw! The dentist and the assistant could not stop the bleeding! Nor could they find anyone close by to stop the bleeding. The rest of the office had closed down and there's poor Marcus, all puffy and numb, bleeding like a reject from Little Shop of Horrors while the dentist and the office manager flipped through a PHONE BOOK looking for an oral surgeon. They left messages with all their contacts but couldn't reach anyone. At one point we decided to go down to Harborview (apparently they are good for mouth emergencies).

Luckily a surgeon in Mill Creek phoned us back and said to come down. Phew. Well this dude fixed Marcus up and instructed him to then visit the ER and have blood work done to see if he had lost too much blood! His assistant said she, in 18 years of experience, had never seen blood gush like that when they moved the gauze.

So back up to Everett to the hospital! (It's 9pm by now!)* Everything is fine with Marcus' blood but now his novocaine is fading FAST.** He's getting the shakes now as his pain climbs up the charts to a seven or an eight :( When he first talked with nurse he asked for drugs and she said "Is that why your here?" I heard this later and was super fired up...no ma'am, he was going to bleed out through HIS MOUTH!!! Give him some damn drugs! Phew, I guess I'm still a little testy about this.

After waiting for "discharge paperwork" which is some sort of purgatory I'm sure, another nurse came with some medicine. Let's stop and do some math...Marcus gets teeth pulled at 4pm. At 10:30 pm he receives his first pain medication.... poor guy!

So since then our home has been under rotation of Percoset and frozen peas. Marcus is definitely not one of those people that play basketball the day after their teeth come out, but we're all trying to take it in stride.

My dream and my New Year's resolution for our family: In 2009, NO MORE HOSPITAL BRACELETS!

Other news: Bradie turned three on Wednesday. Here she is in her birthday dress with her chocolate cake. It's the worst thing I've ever baked but she still loved it! (not quite sure what happened but it was super dry and crumbly, ugh) What can I say? I love this girl. She handed me a Lego phone the other day and said "Mommy, here you go, its Jesus"

The Beau Update: Our son can push himself into a sitting position! He's delighted and I am relieved. Beau is taking about four or five crawl "steps" now before scooting the rest of the way to his desired location. At his six month appointment he was almost 27 inches long and weighed 17# 5 ounces, for all you who like numbers. His percentiles have continued to slide, but that happens when you weigh 10 pounds at birth due to a sugary uterus :)

Speaking of 10 pounds... I have lost that since August 26th! I am thrilled and starting to enjoy shopping in my closet. Now I just need to wean myself back ON to my wedding ring.

* Christy and Troy had our kids, praise the Lord! THANK YOU...we heart our schwenktastic friends.

** Marcus showed a high tolerance to ALL the measures he was given for the extraction: the sedative beforehand, the novacaine and the nitrous affected him only so so.

the latest

2008-09-24T12:47:00.000-07:00

This is Bradie on Monday. She spent the better part of the morning tossing her cookies :(. Poor little thingy! BUT...

WE POOP ON THE POTTY NOW!!! Not one of those capital letters is exaggerated or unnecessary...its a freakin' big deal! WOOT! We are SO proud of our girl. It is funny how I have used the flu as a catalyst in some parenting sticky spots before- Bradie was weaned during a bout with the flu at thirteen months and now all it took was a little diarrhea and voila, stool on the Stool. :)
Beauboy has been a crazy man lately! He has one tooth and is working on two more. In the process he sucked his upper lip so hard that he developed an big blister that turned into a pretty unsightly cold sore. So added to the profuse drooling, Beau's looking a bit ogre-ish right now. And, as if the teething isn't enough, Beau is trying very hard to crawl! He's doing the baby rock on all fours right now which is super cute. Not so cute though is that for two nights in a row he has woken up and babbled for about an hour! Last night he went from 9:45 to 10:45 just talking. So mommy tensely listens waiting for the cry to crescendo but it never happens. Then he likes to wake up at 4:30 am to start his day. Oh, the joys. I try not to do the math on the sleep I am getting because it might depress me.

Just a random Kyle shot here...he's totally "man" enough to rock the pink blankie. I love this kid. He likes me...sometimes.
Let's see, what else? Ah yes, The Office starts up again tomorrow, supplying me with fresh quotes to geek out on. My obsession with the Daily Plate is working- I have lost 8.5 pounds since August 26th! Probably half of that is water of course, but the pre-pregnancy pants ain't lying! Also motivating me is the specter of type 2 diabetes. Having the disease during pregnancy WAY increases the likelihood hood of developing it later in life. The shocker? It hasn't been too terribly difficult. I am eating pretty much whatever I want, but just less of it. I am prioritizing things like ice cream and beer and peanut butter (three of my top faves!), having them once or twice a week instead of everyday (or until the six pack is empty or the carton has been scooped out!) Just being aware of exactly what I eat seems to be the biggest key for me- I just didn't realize before that one beer with dinner for a few days REALLY adds up.

Phew! Off my soap box now, thank you for indulging me!

Dr. Sarah Tancredi is ALIVE!*

2008-09-02T20:22:00.000-07:00

Happy Six Months Little Man! This isn't even a cheesy grin...he smiles like this ALL the time!

Bradie's developed a tic that involves unconsciously tucking her shirt into her pants (but let's be real...its usually a skirt) Here is a great shot of that as well as some feigned shyness.

Thanks for taking me to the Evergreen State Fair Grandma and Papa!

What else is new? Ah yes, first day of school for Marcus. He walked in the door, took off his clothes and went to bed. He gets pretty wiped the first week, so I expected it.

I have discovered Facebook, finally. Talk about nuts! But very cool- there are folks from my DTS that I've been looking for for YEARS! So that's cool. My other obsession is thedailyplate.com. Its a calorie tracking device and food diary- it's pretty cool and I am stoked to be losing some baby weight finally. No tricks just eating less and exercising more. Imagine that, huh? Sorry I will now pull out my thesaurus and research other words for "cool".

Right now Marcus is watching 90210...WHATEVER! I give it a few months at the most.

Bring Luke Perry back and then we'll talk ;)

*Fox's Prison Break has been redeemed for me!

today's cuteness level: DANGER!

2008-08-11T14:01:00.000-07:00

2008-08-11T12:30:00.000-07:00

First bites are avacado. Yummy! He's a little more noodly through the torso than Bradie , but he definitely can lean in and communicate MORE :)
I grew this Zinnia from seed! It is still unfolding as you can see but what a satisfying feeling :) I also have a white cosmos that should be opening soon too!
Summer may be 2/3 over but never too late for a new, warm weather do! One of my favorite people, Christy, cut Bradie's hair for me. She did a great job and I love the cut- it makes Bradie's bangs make more sense.

waddya think?

2008-08-06T22:11:00.000-07:00

Here are some baby pictures to peruse. Yes, I am aware that I need a scanner and a manicure, but don't be so judgy. :)

In order of birth we have.....

Marcus

Sara

Bradie Ann

The Beauberry. BeauBeau. Mr Beau. Bubba. Beaubert. Beaujamin

This last shot is blurry but the expression is perfectly him. It's fun to compare and of course fun for grandmas :)

I can hardly believe how big Bradie is getting! I even got a little misty eyed as I skimmed the MANY photos we've taken. Poor Beau! I am also convicted as I need to snap more shots of his edible little mug because he's quickly approaching that older infant vortex in which they change with dizzying speed.

Marcus is on Order of the Phoenix now **lonely cricket sounds**

Stay cool everyone! :)

2008-07-30T16:47:00.000-07:00

This is Bradie's very first ice cream cone. Otherwise, we have never abused our child! What can you do when your kid breaks out in hives when dairy touches her face? She was awarded above cone after doing the #2 in the potty... hooray, right? Well not the day after or today :( WTH??? Oh well, she's got her Barbie and a conditional pass to the world of ice cream now.

This sweet love muffin can now "razz" with his tongue and his lips. He thinks Bradie is like the funniest thing since Mel Brooks. Also Beau won't grow up to be "soft", as Bradie is plenty big brother enough for him with her "gentle" tickles and "pats" on the tummy that sound like she's working out a bongo. No clue what the blue line is for, either.

I woke up the other night to find Bradie watching the Breakfast Club on CBC. Here's her Ally Sheedy look. One must be prepared for anything during snack time. Seriously she is wearing AT LEAST three shirts in this photo.

What else? Oh, yes. Marcus has decided to reread the Harry Potter series so I haven't talked to him in days. If you see him, let him know I said hey.

doodoodoodoodoodoo twilight zone theme

2008-07-20T21:47:00.000-07:00

Marcus just baked peanut butter cookies. Seriously. He even used parchment paper and a potato masher to indent the tops. They are now resting on a cooling rack and are calling my name. Rightfully so, Marcus is now resting on the couch and I hear Mike Rowe and intermittent beeps which means Deadliest Catch or Dirty Jobs is on the TV. The music sounds more dramatic and not plucky, so I believe we're talking the Bering Sea. That show is sick and wrong and fascinating. But I am SO appreciative because I just had bites of something called a crab ring the other day made by Auntie Michelle that was MONEY! So thanks, crab dudes. And now that Jeremy has acquainted a captain, I am way closer than six degrees away, so I better mind my manners.

A total payout for deck hands flashed on the screen earlier today (no, discovery channel has NOT been on all day!). It was $46,000! I told Marcus he could totally do that. Sure he might die but that is some serious coin! I told him he could pay off his school loans with one fell swoop, but he informed me those would just go away anyway if he died. He then pointed out that me loaning my body as a surrogate (read: baby momma) is much more lucrative when you balance risk to reward. Maybe I'll start with plasma donation and get a new pair of Chacos.

Yes, I realize this may be my most pointless post ever but that is okay. I've been thinking many deep thoughts lately and it is nice to just let my fingers do some jabbering. So thank you if you've read. Shame on you if you've scanned for cute baby pictures and ignored my rantings! :)

Topic switch: I went to the Farmer's Market in Everett and scored some beautiful lettuce, some fatty sugar snaps and an onion. Just one because I have some already and thought I'd do some comparison cooking with mass onion vs. hometown onion and see if there's any difference.

I'll end with an appropriate quote from Marcus:

"{12 Dancing Princesses} It's not that bad of a movie."

i hear sugar helps the medicine go down

2008-07-16T21:22:00.000-07:00

On June 30th my grandpa passed away. He had been battling the affects of congestive heart failure for almost two years and the grown up parts of me have joy knowing he is set free. Another part of me is still trying to own the fact that none of my biological grandparents remain and that an era tying me to my youth has passed.

My grandpa to me is synonymous with endless summer days, the smell of salt water, rope swings, row boats, green trucks, outdoor showers, glass floats, white undershirts, corn stalks, winding roads and savings bonds. I didn't know him well in my adulthood. But it's youthful unawareness that creates those perfect vignettes. I do know that he loved me and my sisters and my cousins very much.

Thank you Grandpa for all that you gave to your family.

the a to z of being me!

2008-07-01T12:26:00.000-07:00

from Bridgets blog:

A- attached or single: year number six to the Marcus

B- best friend: margaret

C- cake or pie: chocolate cake

D-Day of the Week: Friday

E- Essential Item: coffee

F- Favorite color: various blues

G-Gummi bears or worms: worms!

H- Hometown: Gig Harbor, nay, Purdy

I-Indulgences: wine

J- January or July: July most certainly

K- Kids: Bradie-girl, three in October; Beauboy, four months tomorrow!

L- Life is incomplete without- supportive bras and supportive friends

M- Marriage date: August 3

N- number of siblings: 1 sister

O-oranges or apples: apples, where are all the honeycrisps?

P- Phobia or fears: Walking close to really tall objects like light or power poles, logs underwater, being too hot

Q- "When you are arguing against Him, you are arguing against the very power that makes you able to argue at all"- CS Lewis

R- Reason to smile: JESUS!

S- Season: cardamom :)

T- Tag three: hmmm Erin, Christy S, Ellen

U- Unknown fact about me: I have an aversion to cilantro. It tastes HORRIBLE to me! HATE IT! It tastes like cleaner, like soap. My mom does as well. Apparently there is a genetic predisposition to loathe the stuff.

V- Vegetarian or Oppressor to Animals: Vegetarian. Unless...wait....cows and chickens are STILL animals. Nevermind.

W- Worst Habit: Forgetfulness of things like cell phone and keys.

X- Xray or Ultrasound: I think this is an absurd one...ultrasound I suppose. Although x-rays tend to make me look thinner

Y- your favorite food: I love brinner

Z- Zodiac sign: Aries

2008-06-24T20:40:00.000-07:00

Bradie likes to dress herself now. Oh, the joys. Her favorite ensemble is a pleated, plaid skirt from the Gap and a multi-colored striped top from Target. Yes, Bradie is looking for someone to take her clash bowling. And according to the photos below she is also wondering...will YOU take her to funkytown? Or to the roller derby. Whichever is closer.

sweetest boy EVER!

I learned something from Christy, Case's mommy, about blogging. Sometimes its tempting to only show our best on our blog, so here is a picture dedicated to "keepin' it real"

just an update

2008-06-21T21:50:00.000-07:00

My children are growing. Beau, who is 16 weeks old tomorrow, is now asleep in his size 3 diapers and his 6-9 month sleeper...big boy! He also laughs quite readily and is getting so good at holding onto toys. And he has such eyes for his big sister, who might eventually slow down enough to really notice it.

Speaking of sister, we have had two mornings in a row of dry Pull-ups! Come to think of it, I actually didn't have to throw away any wet Pull-ups at all today! Only one poopy one, but even that one still had its little heart shapes on the crotch indicating no wetness! Of course, Number Two is a big deal and such a relief for us to be accomplished but I am finding Bradie is really encouraged by her successes (we all are!) and we're just playing those up as best we can! Naturally, however, every poopy pull up involves talking about the Barbie that is waiting to befriend Bradie when she finally chooses to go. The biggest thing I am celebrating with this is that I have finally let go of the fear of failing...the more I do so, it seems to speak unspoken volumes to my little girl and success seems easier to come by. Go figure, right? :)

Marcus is doing well, he even rode his bike with his friend Troy the other day! Fatigue still sneaks in, but its not as bad as it was after chemo round one. He also FINALLY finished Gilead, which I have been excited to read. Let's see...I'll share something you may not know about Marcus, just for fun. He is an extremely prepared consumer. He knows exactly what bike I'll need, what shorts he will want this winter for basketball practices, and even knows what car we'll buy if (heaven forbid it!) our car breaks. There is, no joke, a tab up on our computer about cultivated gem stones. I mentioned in passing that I would not mind owning a cultivated diamond someday. He's like my own personal shopper if I ever wanted one. Sometimes I feel bad for Marcus, that he is living this low income life when his interests lie in several tax brackets above. But it doesn't stop at shopping. He knows about all sorts of crazy stuff that I often call "useless crap" but really I find the etherea* of the computer/techno gadget world interesting but overwhelming. Like that iPhone for instance. You can, like, surf the internet on that thing! So in theory Marcus could be shopping at the mall and checking the web for other deals elsewhere. It may bring back haggling to the mall, who knows?

Does anyone know what a Ludite is? Marcus calls me one occasionally when I scoff at his passion for technology. Is it something to do with Tiffany's mom? Does it have to do with revealing naked parts of yourself in public places? Hmmm....I think tomorrow I'll go to the library and look it up in an encyclopedia. :)

*etherea is apparently not a word per the red squiggle line...but shouldn't it be???

Being a mommy is easy!

2008-06-17T12:41:00.000-07:00

*from the archive, still helpful to me and still TRUE

Not really. But there are some small things that can help you. Here's what I remember being very eye-opening as a new mom. Its not exhaustive by any means but....okay enough with the qualifiers, here's the list:

*Don't try and get a parking spot close to a store's front entrance; get one that is close to those cart return thingys, even right next to them if possible. This involves getting over the fact that your car might be dinged in the process. This advice is great even past the 50 pound, infant carseat phase.

*Always listen to advice, but don't feel obligated to follow. You never know when you can learn something ingenious.

*Don't read too many books. Knowledge is good and all, but once you get some basic info, try not to be a studier of all things parenting, it can make you feel crazy.

*Diaper wipes can be folded several times, revealing a "fresh" side with which to wipe up poop.

*Plastic shopping bags from the supermarket work better than any Diaper Genie or similar contraption

*You, as the mommy, will change instantly. You are immediately in love and it is incredible. But don't be shocked or feel guilty if you sometimes feel the need to grieve. With birth comes of a lot of "death" in quiet, unexpected ways. Things will never be the same again and that is a HUGE adjustment, so take this in stride.

* Some people (namely the daddy) take a little longer to make this change. Be patient and be not shocked about this. It is normal.

*Someday your baby will fart in your face. Like, enough to blow your hair around a little. Try not to freak out.

*Breastfeeding is HARD but so worth it. Somedays you may say "*&^# this!" but try and stick with it if at all possible. And it is not hypocritical that I add that it is NOT the end of the world if you decide to quit.

*Prepare to meet your Maker. There is nothing like a newborn to bring you to your knees and talk to God, even if you never have before. And that is no accident. He designed it to be so.

*An extension of your heart and soul is forever on your sleeve. This means life becomes more full and meaningful in a way you never imagined. It also means the possibility of deep pain, loss and suffering are more real.

*Enjoy your little one! They change FAST! Try to take time out to really be present in the moment each day...jot down what you observe if you feel like it. These random thoughts will be priceless to you in the future.

2008-06-05T12:10:00.000-07:00

It has been one year since my father in law Carl went home to heaven. If you at all followed Marcus' blog during that time, you must read his latest post dedicated to his dad.

I just read his post for the third time and find myself so thankful for all that God allows in our lives and reveling in His provision to carry on. Without being broken we would miss mercy entirely. Without suffering, life would lack its sweetness. Without risk our faith would become flabby...

Forgive my tendency to wax on! Please, just go check out his blog! :)

three months

2008-06-02T21:28:00.000-07:00

Nearly one year ago

you began to shine my face,

mock my stomach

and pull dark doubts from among the skeletons.

you grew

and grew within a new purpose.

draped fresh in quiet fears,

your tiny heart beat despite

heat and stress and your sister wrestling me.

my second, my son

never think the surprise

was not meant

almightiness only works in exacting

measure as it pulls, prods and

shapes its tiny pots.

who's buying me a drink tonight?

2008-05-30T13:27:00.000-07:00

Because I just spent a half an hour swiffering my floor and rubbing POOP off my dog's face. I caught him noshing a Bradie diaper just as I laid the kids down for their nap. Now he's pacing the floor, approaching lunacy the same way a person might be after losing a winning lottery ticket.

Marcus, will you come home soon?

tgif

potpourri

2008-05-28T20:05:00.000-07:00

A few days ago, Marcus came striding into our bedroom with a tell-tale jingling sound following him. He pulled from his pajama pants pocket four bottles of pills and threw them to the bed as he climbed in. He sighed, "I look like a damn cancer patient!" This response caught us both by surprise and good chuckle was had.

This same man came home today with a fire under him and proceeded to move all the furniture so he could vacuum underneath. By Marcus' definition, this is real vacuuming. I try to check the vacuuming chore off my list about once (gasp!) a week. He always notices but often will ask me, "did you move stuff?" This is when I gesture towards the squirming poo machine on his playmat or Tornado Sue busily emptying her Lego box over the fresh carpet and say, "Yes, I moved them and that should be good enough!"

Same day and with the same fire, Marcus is doing the dinner dishes. I help by stowing away the perishables (we had fajitas, if you wonder). For whatever reason I am singing Paula Abdul's "Opposites Attract". I find that I still remember the words to this song, and am quite pleased with myself. Marcus could care less until I take "two steps forward" and dance up on him Night at the Roxbury style, only to have him crack the tiniest smile. He's always a tough crowd, but I find it keeps my own comedy sharp.

2008-05-26T20:54:00.000-07:00

Happy long weekend and happy Memorial Day!

We find ourselves thankful and relieved for Marcus to be done with his second and final dose of chemotherapy. He got a prescription of Zofran at the hospital this time and was told to take it along with ALL the other anti-nauseas....hmm, why someone didn't mention earlier that you could take them all in combination is baffling to us, but we don't care. We are just thrilled no cookies were tossed!

Grandma Janie and Papa Dave also spent the weekend with us which is always super fun and a big relief for me, especially not knowing how the chemo would settle with Marcus this time. Bradie LOVES her Grandma and Papa! Brad also had dinner with us (always shows up at dinner time, its the strangest thing) and helped us to procure some Josh Ritter tickets for this summer. I am not totally sold on Josh Ritter, so I am sure the concert will help push me into fan status.

Let's see... oh, Bradie is *trying* to potty train. She did really well and had kind of a meltdown and now we're back to yelling at the mere mention of the potty. I've heard it can be a step forward/step back process, so I am trying to be patient and wise. And as helpful as Grandma was with pottying Bradie, I think having an "audience" might have been too much?? AHHHH! I don't know what I am doing! I find myself questioning my choices with parenting all the time and worrying that my daughter will one day discuss her "mommy issues" with Dr. Phil! Okay, that might be a little dramatic, but everything feels so major sometimes with a two year old.

And Beau. The kid is a peach. A fuzzy, smiley, squishy peach. And he's doing this almost laugh thing that sounds like Goofey. I love him. He's worth missing out on all the dairy products in the world! Yeah, the kid poops green otherwise, which is lame.

I will end with some ghetto facts:

The smaller the yard, the bigger the dog.

It is strangely quiet on Indy weekend.

Malt liquor is a fine choice for hydration while watching small children.

2008-05-19T07:18:00.000-07:00

I will try and blog soon but for now, please see Marcus' Weblog for some cute pictures and The Motivators for some inspired words by Brad.

edible, past and present

2008-05-08T20:36:00.000-07:00

And I feel confident enough in the images of my adorable children to add an update as well. Chemo sucks. Marcus is recovered from the emetic side effects, although very tired. Zofran is a miracle drug and he shall be requesting that from the get-go of dose number two scheduled for 5/22.

Oh and Beau's two month visit happened last week:
24.5 inches long- 90%
12 pounds 15.5 ounces- 80%
melon is 39 cm- 50%

Nothing like big, tall baby boys with itty bitty heads! :)

Magically Mundane

a truly pathetic post- Schoolies

travelogue 2

travelogue 1

For limited time only... an infomercial of sorts

Baby, you're a firework...

rain is a blessing

some other March stuff in April...

uno, dos, TRES!

January Schmanuary

duh

maybe HE will be a foodie too...someday

maybe SHE will Scrabble it up with me...someday

What's an "ode", mommy?

Five Years Old

And, finally, I present to you Shhhh.....

goings on

Bradie's First Backpacking Trip!

growing

floatilla

easy living

kdfadkfhgk;ahdfg

Arise my blog...

a smidgeon

little by little.... Jesus is changing me!

cauliflower, sweet and sour, half an hour... Veggie tales!

joyeux anniversaire beau mon cher...

sweethearts

3:19 pm, the tail end of nap time...

proud wife

on the lighter side....

Christmas 2009

air guitar, anyone?

mini Daddy of course, but....

making like a baby

so long baby mullet

yo mom

I never said I'd be Posty Posterson or anything

Well, she did it...

blech

beauflex

Bradie says

Marcus, Brad and David Gray...

quotable

not even close to kidding

summer snippets

oh, Sweet Pea, won't you dance with me?

fractured Cinderella (and out of order too!)

hello stranger

whoa

stop and smell my blog

hamantaschen...

zoo? why for?

just an update

post brought to you by Super Why :)

If you are not too squeamish...

Christmas comes early...

booyah

I am alive...

Happy 8th Month beaublueeyes!

like chandler bing, I do my duties

does this sound braggy?

For Erin and others

the latest

Dr. Sarah Tancredi is ALIVE!*

today's cuteness level: DANGER!

waddya think?

doodoodoodoodoodoo *twilight zone theme*

i hear sugar helps the medicine go down

the a to z of being me!

just an update

Being a mommy is easy!

three months

who's buying me a drink tonight?

potpourri

edible, past and present

doodoodoodoodoodoo twilight zone theme